J-Hope Oneshots and Sickfics

Gone 2

Original request by Shriparna0

Part 2 request by @limetitan

Hopekook

------

Sometimes, Jungkook really did blame himself. But at other times, he didn't.

It was true that he hadn't known what was going on with Hoseok when it had happened, but that was because Hoseok had never bothered to tell him. Figured that he was too little to know anything. That didn't stop him from showing off to him though. No, Jungkook knew about Hoseok very well. He was that talented trainee who had won multiple national dance competitions, was learning how to rap and produce, and no doubt would make the final cut. He was friendly too, with an easy smile that charmed everyone. Jungkook had fallen prey to it easily.

And as one of the youngest trainees, he had a habit of making the others go all protective over him. Hoseok was no exception. He always made sure Jungkook was having an easy time, helping him with the dance personally if he was having trouble with it, and things like that. Jungkook appreciated it, he really did.

What he really regretted was even though Hoseok had asked him many times if he was doing alright, he had never bothered to do the same for him. Jungkook had figured that everything was okay.

And that's what made him feel guilty.

-------

But in all seriousness, he didn't know. Goddamn it, he was just a kid. Everything was just still so new for him. Without his parents in this big city, it was scary. He had had a habit of becoming overly dependant on people older than him. Since he was the youngest wherever he went, it was all too easy.

------

"Holy..."

Hoseok knelt down near the doorway to his studio, the door shut tight. Here, he finally had the privacy to let out all that he had been feeling for the past few days.

Frustration? Maybe. Probably. Definitely. He had no clue what was going to happen for the future. He had never thought of himself as an anxious person in the past, but not anymore. Now, he could find loopholes out of anything. What if this happened? What if this didn't happen? What in the world would he do then?

See, he wasn't prepared for everything. He had gambled everything away to achieve his dream. And he was still very passionate. He always would be.

But the fears people tried to plant in him were founded on very real facts, and that caused him to only worry.

He buried his face into his knees. Maybe if he stayed like this for a while, he would feel better.

It would be nice if he got to talk to someone about this, but he was scared that the others would get mad if he did. Everyone else was so focused on what they wanted. How could go in there and say that he was worried about them never finding any success? He would be kicked out.

Yoongi was too passionate. So was Namjoon. So was Jimin. He didn't know Taehyung or Jin that well. Jungkook was far too young. He would get freaked out if he suddenly started ranting to him about all his problems. No, Jungkook had enough on his plate.

After a long while, Hoseok managed to get to his feet. He staggered over to his computer. He had to get to work. There was so much to do - for what or why, he had no clue - and he needed to get started. None of the others were having second thoughts like he was. No, they plunged themselves into work as sincerely as they could. It was only Hoseok who felt like this.

Oh, he so badly wished that he could just banish all these worries far, far away.

-------

He stopped being so careful. He let down his guard in front of Namjoon and Yoongi a few times. He told them about how unhappy he was. The feedback that he got from them was well-intentioned but poor. He was thankful that none of them had outright told him to leave, but nothing helped him out.