Wild At Heart (Zuko)

Chapter Thirty-Seven

Zuko and Kali are lying in a patch of grass, staring up at the starry sky above them, a soft breeze disturbing the grass around them, their fingers laced together between them. Neither of them feels the need to say something. The night was more than Kali could have imagined when he told her that they were going out. They had dinner together and then took a walk, ending up on a small hill of grass, where they are now. Kali glances at him, watching his face. She knows why he did this, why he brought her out, but she fears that he thinks this is enough. This one night is enough to make her stay inside. She wishes it was going to be that easy. But she doesn't think this will be enough to change her mind. She shifts closer to him, sets her head to his shoulder and closes her eyes, his arm wraps around her as she curls into his side.

"Thank you, Zuko," She tells him, he hums a little and then looks at her. There is a sadness in her voice that he seems to miss. She is sad. There is this feeling in the pit of her stomach. One warning her of coming pain. And she knows...it will be because of her. She is going to give herself a deadline. To fix herself. To fix this situation. She needs to find a better solution. A better way to live. A way that doesn't include being locked away. She wants a life. A real one. One where she can go to the market or the tea shop whenever she wants. She wants to be normal. Like everyone else.

.....

The apartment is quiet as Kali sits cross-legged on the floor, the mirror in front of her as she focuses on it. Her skin rippling as she changes herself, back and forth between green skin and slightly tanned skin. She is practising. Just pushing herself to get control over the change. If she can control it then she can keep it up longer.

"Little Flower?" She jumps, her skin turning green again as she turns to find Iroh behind her, watching her. "What are you doing?" He approaches her and she shrugs a little. He knows what she was doing. It was pretty obvious that she was attempting to change her skin tone with her bending, and she was succeeding, he's just not sure why. "Is this what has been causing your nose bleeds?" He asks her, she nods a little. "You know that Zuko likes you just the way you are" Iroh assures her. "That he isn't asking you to change...."

"It's not about him" She whispers and scratches at her arm. Iroh sits beside her as she lets out a long breath. "My skin has been a novelty for others for as long as I can remember" She admits. "Raya used it to bring in..." She stops and pulls a face. "They would pay more because I am green. For so long I was kept hidden away, behind walls, behind a veil, I just always assumed it was because I was a slave, but it wasn't...I see that now, I see that it was my skin that kept me hidden, and even though you freed me..."

"You still feel imprisoned by your situation" He adds, she nods.

"I adore you both so much and I am so grateful for everything you have done for me" She assures him. "But I don't know how long I can stay with you...how long I can stay here..." She glances over at Zuko, fast asleep in bed.

"Do not worry about my nephew" Iroh scolds softly. "Do not stay simply to make him happy"

"I do not want to leave him" She whispers as she looks down. She might not want to leave him, but for her own happiness and health, she might just have to. She is happy with him, but she would be happier free of the confines of this city. She would be happier still if he were to go with her, but she'd never ask that of him. He is safe here, for now. He can't leave the city for the risk of getting caught either by the Earth Kingdom or worse, his sister. If she leaves, it will be alone. It's going to break her heart to leave him. But it might be better to do it now, before it's too late. She looks down at her hands, watching as they change again, the green of her skin disappearing. This is the answer to the problem right now, but it will not be long term if she can't learn to permanently change herself. If she has to go, she will. She was freed, she is free, she has to start living her life. Even if, in the end, that is not with Zuko.

"Whatever you decide," Iroh tells her. "Make sure you are happy with the outcome...." He takes her face in his hands. "You have come so far already, Little Flower. Do not let anything hold you back from what you need" She nods and he leans forward to kiss her forehead before he pulls back. "Get some sleep" He whispers as he stands and moves into the next room. Kali lets out a breath and closes her eyes. Iroh is right. If she needs to leave for the sake of herself, then she has to. With or without Zuko. Pushing herself to her feet, she puts the mirror away before she climbs into bed next to Zuko who shifts, sensing her there with him, hands reaching out for her. Zuko pulls her closer, wrapping his arms around her in his sleep. She lets out a soft breath and nuzzles into him.