Wild At Heart (Zuko)

Chapter Thirty-Eight

The next afternoon, Zuko has a tray of tea as he moves around the tea shop, serving the patrons. He can keep his mind pretty occupied on Kali for the most part, that helps him get through the mundaneness of this job. He can look forward to going home to her. It's rather domesticated and normal he supposes. Going back to a home with someone that loves him, he assumes that she loves him, she wouldn't have stuck around and stuff if she didn't. He turns to move to another table when a flicker of red hair catches his eye, in his peripheral vision close by. He frowns a little before he turns and then almost drops the tray. Kali stands there in the doorway and he knows it is her. Even though she's not green, even though she looks....just like everyone else, he knows that it's her. From those green eyes to the red hair. That scar on her shoulder and down her arm which she has on full display. She smiles at him, tucking her hair behind her ear. He sets the tray on an empty table and moves towards her. A dumbstruck expression on his face. He didn't know she could do something like this. He has no idea how she has managed it. She touches her stomach, hands-on her dress as her eyes flicker around. She's still nervous about being outside when the sun is still up. Zuko looks over her, slowing as he reaches her. He's not sure what to make of this look. He knows what this means to her, but there is something in his head, he is unable to click her and this look into place.

"Kali" He whispers and reaches for her hand, but stops himself. He can't bring himself to touch her like this. "What did you do to your skin?" He asks her. But he's not as happy about it as she is. Like this, she can go out and around like everyone else. She can enjoy her time here. His hand hovers over her arm as he looks over her.

"It's okay, it's not forever, not yet anyway" She assures him. "I just...I wanted an afternoon...to try it out" he touches her arm and brushes his thumb over her skin, to see if it comes off, whatever this is. But nothing changes. She doesn't even feel like her anymore. "It's plants, I've been practising...." She whispers. "What do you think?"

"It's not you" He whispers sadly. He fell in love with her the way she was. With her beautiful green skin. It's like without it, she loses part of herself. A part of what makes her so wonderfully unique. That shows who she is and her connection with her plants and nature. That's what he loves about her, how connected she is to the world around them, how connected she is to nature. She watches his expression, watches his face. But he's not as happy about this as she is. He's not as happy about the outcome.

"You don't like it" She realises and pulls away from him with a frown.

"Why would I like something that changes who you are?" He asks. "Why do you have to change at all?"

"I'm still me" She argues, shifting closer to him, peering at him, begging him to see her. "The colour of my skin doesn't change that" He lets out a breath because he knows that. He knows she is right. He knows that she is more than her green skin. But he is struggling to see her like this. Struggling to see the person she is beneath it. "I just..." She sighs. "I wanted to spend some time outside"

"We went out, together, just last night..." He starts, she scoffs and he looks at her. "I thought that would make you happy"

"One night" She reminds him. "You..." She stops and shakes her head. "Zuko" She gives him a look. "I'm so tired and I feel so alone"

"You're not alone" He assures her. But he doesn't understand. He's trying. But it's not helping her. She glances at Iroh behind him who gives her an encouraging smile. Just reassuring her that whatever happens here, he supports her. "I thought it would be a start, until we could figure something else out" She motions to herself, to her new appearance. She worked hard to get this. She worked hard to get it to stay in place. To change her for long enough to leave the apartment and come down here.

"I did" She points out. "I figured something else out" She leans closer to him, her eyes searching his but it's different for him. This isn't the her that he's used to. She kisses the corner of his lips and then shifts to kiss him full on the lips. But he does nothing. His mind still working to catch up to what's going on. She stops and lets out a disappointed breath. She thought she was fixing this. Fixing everything. Fixing what was wrong with her. "Fine" She breaths against his lips and then pulls back from him. She pulls off her collar and sets it into his hand. "I can't do this anymore" She admits quietly. "I won't be there when you get home," She tells him, firmly. She can't stay locked away anymore. She's had enough. Zuko swallows a little as he stares down at her collar, curling his fingers into it. He looks up to find that she's gone. He turns and looks around to the tea shop but she's nowhere to be seen. He then turns to find his uncle watching him, Iroh gives him a disappointed look. But Zuko knows he screwed up. It was just a shock. Seeing her like that. Seeing looking so human but so wrong at the same time. Zuko lets out a breath and then hurries after her, stepping out of the tea shop and into the crowded street. His eyes flick around for Kali. But she's gone. Disappeared. His hand hurts with how hard he is holding to the collar. He knows she isn't bluffing. He knows she's been finding it difficult but not enough to leave. Not enough to leave him.