I see you in the stars - Jegulus

Chapter 8 - James

"Look into my eyes and you'll see, I'm the only one. You've captured my love, stolen my heart, changed my life.." James' voice trailed off into a broken hum, carrying on his singing of You take my breath away.

It felt very fitting at that moment.

He felt delirious. The lack of sleep finally catching up to him as he sat at their tree. It had been two hours since he arrived. Late.

He was still waiting for him.

It was ridiculous. In the back of his mind he truly knew waiting here like this, in the cold, was utterly ridiculous.

But he still waited for him.

James stayed there for another hour, before finally realising somewhere in his brain that he needed to sleep, and get ready for the quidditch game tomorrow. He got up, groaning as his muscles protested against the movements. He looked around for a moment, before sighing quietly and started his walk back to the castle.

He didn't know what he was thinking. He didn't know why he stayed there for so long for a boy who had already come, waited and left. It just felt like he was doing something. Something to make up for it, even if Regulus never knew.

But it didn't stop the ache in his heart as he realised his fear had come true.

He didn't make it in time.

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"Is he deaf?"

"I think.. he's sleeping."

"With his eyes open?"

"I dunno, but it looks like his sleeping face."

"You've.. seen his sleeping face."

"Uh duh, when we have our sleepovers of course."

"Oh merlin."

James could hear the murmurs distantly, but didn't pay them any attention. He was tired, so fucking exhasted he thought he would collapse. But it didn't matter, none of it mattered because Regulus wouldn't fucking look at him. He had been staring at him the entire time he entered the Great Hall, and the boy hadn't looked up once from the book he was reading. Not to talk to his friends, not to eat anything, and certainly not to look at James. It was infuriating, and incredibly gut wrenching. He suddenly felt a hard slap on the top of his head, startling him and effectively taking him out of his trance. Looking around him in confusion, he sees Marlene and Sirius staring at him rather..creepily.

"I-uh what?" James splutters, trying to shake himself out of exhaustion. He had only two hours of sleep, which wasn't good for him considering how little he had been getting previously.

"Mate you look.. well dead. Kinda." Sirius snorted but nudged his arm in comfort. James tried to grin, still only half with it.

"I'm just tired, and nervous about the game." He mumbled, drinking his tea absently. Marlene and Sirius looked at each other in confusion, seeming to get more worried.

"James, you're never nervous for a game. Actually, you're normally alarmingly cocky." Marlene says as she pokes James, like she didn't know what to do with him. He just shrugs, staring at his mug, tracing around its rim. Sirius whispers something to Remus, who looks over at James with his eyebrows furrowed.

"Prongs." He says softly, leaning over Sirius to touch his arm gently. James just smiled and nodded, quickly standing up and avoiding his friend's concerned stares.

"We should go get changed for the game." He walked off before anyone could say anything else, and as he left the Great Hall he looked over his shoulder one more time to look at Regulus, who didn't even seem to notice him at all.