Fake Love Turned Real [ A Barson Fanfic]

13

TW: Talking about child loss

Rafael's POV

"Hey, baby. I'm sorry that I couldn't get to the appointment. There is no valid excuse, so I won't tell you what happened. I love you, and will see you at home." I frowned before ending the call. As I headed towards the lobby, I locked my phone and put it in my pocket.

"Mr. Barba!" my assistant called as soon as I appeared.

"Regina? Uh, what are you doing here? I didn't ask you to come." 

"I have been calling you for over an hour!"

"Why? What's wrong?" I questioned quickly once I noticed the tears on her cheeks.

"There was an accident at the courthouse... Mrs. Barba-"

"Oh, my god. What happened to Olivia?!" I demanded.

"An angry suspect pushed her down the stairs... I was there with her afterwards and I stayed until the ambulance got there! You wouldn't pick up, so I called your mother to be with her!" Regina sobbed. 

///

I didn't stay with Regina for much longer before I was catching a taxi to the hospital. When I arrived, the ER was too loud and I could barely process what I needed to do. I stood for a while, before a nurse approached me.

"You must be Rafael Barba." She spoke gently.

"I-i think so... my wife was hurt." I whimpered.

"We just moved Olivia up to another room. It's quiet up there, so she can recover."

"She lost our baby, huh?" I whispered.

"I'm sorry, Mr. Barba. Would you like me to take you to her?"

"Please."

The elevator ride was long, but the walk to Olivia's room was longer. When we got to the door, the nurse left my side, and I stood there for a long moment. All that was running through my head was the pain that my wife was in when our child was taken from her. How she must hate me for not being there when it happened, and it was all because I had my phone off and my meeting ran late.

The door opened from the inside, and I was face to face with my mother. She didn't think for a second longer before pulling me tightly to her chest.

"I am so sorry, love." She breathed as her hand gently rubbed my back.

"I should have told you sooner about the baby. About what was happening, then you didn't have to be blindsided."

"Don't beat yourself up over this, Rafa. Just go in there and be with your wife. I'm going to call your Abuela, let her know what is happening."

"What is happening, though? Is she okay?"

"She's not okay, Rafael. She won't be okay for a very long time."

///

Olivia's POV

I tried to sleep after Lucia left, but I didn't even get the chance since my husband was coming into the room. He didn't speak at first, but I could smell his cologne.

"I'm sorry." I whispered.

"Liv-"

"I shouldn't have spoken to him at all... I should have just walked past and went into the courtroom. Then our son wouldn't be dead."

"Son." Rafael spoke softly, as I weakly rolled over onto my back. My husband had tears flowing freely down his cheeks, and his hands were shaking by his sides.

"I ruined everything, Rafa! I killed our son and probably ruined our fucking marriage!" I yelled, since my husband had frozen in his spot.

Rafael surprised me when he shook his head and walked to my bedside.

"You didn't kill our son, and our marriage isn't ruined. We can make it through this, Olivia. No matter how hard this is going to be, I'm not done fighting. I will help you make it through this, just like you will do for me. I promise you that." Rafael spoke passionately, as he reached out and brushed hair away from my face.

Rafael sat on the edge of the bed, before pulling me into his arms. I had to adjust my position in his arms for a few moments, before the pain faded and I could be comforted by my husband's strong arms.

We didn't speak, but I knew that each of us had so much running through our heads. I couldn't get the image of my son's extremely tiny body out of my head. It was clear that Rafael was beating himself up for not being there when everything happened.

"We need to name him." Rafael whispered after he kissed my hair.

"Huh?"

"We have to put something on his urn or gravestone. I know he was born at sixteen weeks, but I will not let them just toss him away. He's our child." Rafael spoke passionately. I bit my lip, before nodding hesitantly. 

"Do you want to honor your father still, or would that be a waste of his name?" I whispered.

"It would not be a waste. Our son is with my father as we speak, Livvie. He's holding him and loving on him in the way we can't." Rafael smiled at me tearfully as I looked up at him.

"I want him to have your name as his middle name. Okay?"

"It's an honor, baby."

///

I was in the hospital for three days. A social worker that came to talk to us pushed the hospital to keep me for an extra day, just to be safe. Mentally and physically, I was in tatters, but they didn't want to keep me longer and Rafael refused to send me to a hospital.

My husband came to get me, and we went to the funeral home to pick up our son's ashes. Rafael paid extra to get them sooner, since we wanted to bring him home with us.

"How was the shower?" Rafael asked as I left our bedroom. 

"I have to wear a bag on my arm, so not great." I sighed weakly. Rafael walked to me and pulled me into his arms. We embraced for a long moment, shared a few sparkless kisses, before he led me to the sofa. I sat down on it before looking at the shelf above the TV. 

Tears burned my eyes as I saw our son's urn sitting there. It was so small, and all I could think about was how he shouldn't be up there. Our little Javier Rafael Barba should be in my arms in a few months, but some bastard had to take him away from us.