𝐖𝐇𝐄𝐍 𝐋𝐎𝐕𝐄 𝐑𝐀𝐈𝐍𝐒 𝐎𝐍 𝐔𝐒 | 𝐌𝐄𝐆𝐔𝐌𝐈 𝐅𝐔𝐒𝐇𝐈𝐆𝐔𝐑𝐎

𝐖𝐇𝐄𝐍 𝐈𝐓 𝐑𝐀𝐈𝐍𝐒

ʚ𝐌𝐄𝐆𝐔𝐌𝐈'𝐒 𝐏𝐎𝐕ɞ

I see her.

Every time it rains.

Only when it rains.

We've never met, nor do I wish to meet her. I'm content with my faraway observations, appreciating her while she appreciates the rain.

I can't make out details, to me her eyes are just eyes, I imagine them to be (e/c), possibly (e/c) but I've never been close enough to find the truth.

Her hair is (h/c), im not sure how else to describe it really, there's no other colours brimming the surface, just brown.

But it's pretty. I never use to notice her. I was always an observer of my environment, like the
oak tree that looms over the abandoned park, which grows more in beauty by the day. The flickering street lamp that remains to be fixed, 4 years post breakage. I have a small soft spot for the lone fish that outlived the rest in the
pond, he's the only one still swimming, we relate in that way.

Yet all of those fall short in comparison to the allure of rain. I can't seem to comprehend the reason behind my fascination, but I'm not in any position to question it, why overthink something you enjoy?

I find myself residing in the same spot every night, the rickety bench that strains under my weight but still stands, holding its position under the shade of the great oak.

It's the perfect spot to watch the town go by, I get to see the group of drunk dads on their way home every night, the teenagers living their rebellion through cigarettes and alcohol and again, the rain, striking each surface that lays before it.

So here I am, Saturday, December 3rd, 10:30pm, no 11:18pm, sat on the bench that I may as well claim ownership of, under the great oak tree once again. And there she is.

Leaving her house, dressed in the usual, a hoodie that is obviously too big for her and I can never make out whether it's leggings or jeans that cover her legs, either way they're black, they're always black.

I never see her face, for it stays hidden beneath her hood, disguising her expressions and leaving the question of her mood an unsolvable puzzle. Is she happy right now? Is she sad?

There's no way to know. She's remains a walking mystery, one that I so desperately want to solve but also want to remain that of a mystery forever. I find it amusing how she's never noticed me before, she seems the observant type, the way she extends her arms to allow the raindrops to grace her fingertips. The way her head rolls to each side to glance around in awe of her surroundings.

Never once have I seen one so in favour of rain more than myself, but this girl seems to relish in it. I wouldn't say I'm an insomniac, labelling my sleepless night make them more prevalent but I find it easier to ignore the heavy bags adorning my face and drown out my fatigue with caffeine.

Nanami's coffee shop is the only tolerable establishment in this town. It's not your typical coffee shop, by that I mean it's ugly. You wouldn't take any aesthetic photos of fancy drinks here, you get your coffee and you drink it. How it should be. That's why I love it. I sit in one of the empty booths by the front window and pull out my notebook. It's occupied with my every thought, exploding with words upon words of every little thing that passes through my mind.

I like to people watch. It's a small town so everyone knows everyone, but no one really knows anyone when you really think about it. I could relay to you everything that I'm thinking of right now but you would never know if I truly told you everything. The beauty of the unknown is what spurs my imagination.

4 pages of rambling later I close my book and breath a deep sigh. Contemplation is a killer. I always seem to think for too long that I push my mind into overdrive.

Today's consuming thought is me. What am I doing with my life? Sitting in a coffee shop by day and sitting on a bench in the rain by night. That's never what envisioned for myself, but I can't say I'm mad at it. I do wonder though, what kind of life I could live outside of this town, if I lived in a big city would I be happier? I wouldn't exactly describe myself as happy right now, I'm not sad either, I suppose I'm just neutral. I'm not dying, but surely this isn't what truly living is like? There has to be more to life then coffee shops and rain.

Right?

雨