Finally Home

30. Tyler

She's alive? Jenna says Sam is alive. She swears she wouldn't lie to me, but what if she is because she's so hurt that I got Samantha killed? What if she wants to inflict more pain on me than the pain of knowing what I did?

Jenna's here beside me. She's holding my hand. But she didn't bring Rosie. Is she keeping Rosie from me? So I don't do anything to Rosie, too?

"Where's Rosie?" I asked Jenna.

"She's at home with Debby. It was two in the morning when you called. I didn't want to wake her up, and I just wanted to get here. I needed to know what was happening before I decided what to do about bringing Rosie. Debby might bring her up today, later. I'm going to call the hotel and see if we can extend your room stay. I'm sure if I explain the situation, they'll understand. That way when you get released, you'll have a comfortable bed to sleep in while Samantha gets better."

I didn't say anything. Jenna had to be lying to me. I saw Sam when they brought her out of the truck. She was a rag doll. Covered in blood. They were doing CPR on her. You do that on someone whose heart isn't beating. And hers was not beating.

Josh was sitting nearby. He hadn't said much either. He also tried to tell me Sam was alive. I wanted to believe it, but again, I'd seen her body when they pulled her out of my destroyed truck.

There was a knock at the door and I looked over. A police officer was standing there with Samantha's backpack. I broke down into tears again. No doubt he was here to arrest me.

"Mr. Joseph?" The officer said.

"I know," I replied.

"I? I'm sorry, what do you know?" The officer asked. But I couldn't answer.

"He's having a hard time. He thinks our daughter died in the crash, but while she's critical and in a coma on life support, she is alive," Jenna said to the officer.

"Oh. Oh. I'm sorry. I was just coming to bring this. It was found in the truck when we got it away from the crash site. Is it yours?"

"It's Samantha's backpack. Thanks," Jenna said.

"I thought I'd drop it by. By the way, it looks like the driver of the truck that hit your husband and daughter had been driving for 18 hours straight. We did a breathalyzer on the scene but he blew two different levels. So we're waiting on bloodwork."

"Thank you," Jenna said.

"I hope your husband and daughter have speedy and full recoveries."

"Thank you, again," Jenna said.

I curled up on my bed and cried. Why were they being so cruel? Why were they trying to convince me Samantha is alive?

Josh got up and left the room.

"Does he hate me?" I managed the courage to ask Jenna? "You hate me, does Josh?"

"Tyler, sweetheart," Jenna said, climbing onto the bed with me and wrapping her arms around me. "No one hates you. You did nothing wrong."

"I got our daughter killed," I sobbed.

"You didn't," Jenna said.

Just then, Josh came back into the room with a wheelchair.

"Tyler, get in the chair," he said, tersely.

"Why?"

"I'm taking you to see Samantha. I cleared it with your nurse. I can't stand seeing you beat yourself up and think we all hate you when you did nothing wrong and Samantha is alive. So get your ass in this chair so we can prove to you once and for all that Samantha is alive."

Jenna helped me out of bed and into the wheelchair. She put a blanket over my legs because I was in a hospital gown and it's not that warm.

Josh pushed the chair down the hall and onto the elevator.

"I don't know why you're trying to convince me she's alive. I saw her body. I saw the blood. She wasn't breathing. They had to do CPR. They used a defibrillator. The truck hit her side of the car."

Neither of them said a word. Jenna held my hand and squeezed it. I didn't squeeze back. I didn't deserve it.

Besides, they were probably taking me to the morgue so I could see the damage I really did to our daughter.

But the elevator stopped only one floor down. That's a strange place for a morgue. I thought they put the morgues in the basement.

Josh pushed the chair down the hallway towards a set of doors that said PICU. The. He pushed me through them.

"Room seven," Jenna said.

They pushed me into the room and up to the figure on the bed.

"Sam, honey," Jenna said. "I brought Dad down to see you."

"Sam?" I said, taking her gauze covered hand in mine. "Sam? Are you really alive?"

She didn't answer. A tube was in her mouth. There was a tube coming out of her chest and it looked like blood coming from it. Tubes came out from under the covers. She had an I.V. And one with blood. Her head was wrapped in bandages and her right leg was in a cast.

I stared at her.

"You're alive. How are you alive? The truck hit your side. You weren't breathing. Sam, you have to come back to us. I'm sorry sweetheart. I'm sorry you're here. I'm sorry you got so hurt. Please, Samantha. Please get better."

I sobbed into her blanket.