Finally Home

87. Jenna

I wouldn't say Samantha turned a corner after Brendon spoke to her, but I suppose you could say she merged into traffic so to speak. She stopped fighting everything. Her attitude improved some. Even the nurses commented that she was much more pleasant, even though happy is not the word one would use to describe her.

She finally was allowing visitors and Erin and Jill came first.

"Hey there bestie!" Jill said, bounding into the room.

Samantha just looked at her.

"Hey," she answered simply.

"How's it going?" Jill asked in a song song voice. Samantha frowned at her.

"It's going great, Jill. Maybe I can stay here long enough for them to take my other leg."

"Dark," Jill said. She wasn't going to let Samantha get her down, and she wasn't going to let Sam be down, no matter how hard she tried.

"What's coach saying? Am I off the team?" Sam asked.

Jill frowned at Sam.

"Why would you be off the team?"

"Because, Jill," Samantha said. "I can't play anymore."

"Sure you can. You'll get a fake leg and you'll play again. But coach says that a) she's coming to visit you and b) you're still assistant coach if you want it."

"Yeah. That's what I want. Watching people do the one thing I was good at and can't do anymore."

Jill sighed and looked over at Tyler. He shrugged.

Her mood hadn't improved that much. But at least she was letting people visit.

Jill and Erin left and Samantha lay back and closed her eyes. I sat next to her and ran my fingers through her hair. I traced the scar that ran along the side of her head from the accident in October in Cleveland.

"Mom, don't do that. It feels weird," Sam mumbled.

"Sorry, baby," I smiled.

The next morning, Samantha woke up crying.

"Sweetheart!" I said. "What's the matter?"

"My leg hurts!" Samantha cried.

"Where?" I asked. I would massage her leg then.

"The calf. It's cramping up."

I massaged the calf on her left leg.

"No! My other leg!"

I stopped and looked at Sam.

"Uh, Sam?" I asked, not wanting to state the obvious.

"I know. I know it's gone but it hurts!" She cried. I called for the nurse. This was worrying me. How could she have pain in her missing leg?

The nurse came in and listened to us.

"It's called Phantom pain. It's the brain mixing up signals. It thinks the leg is still there and doesn't realize it isn't," she said as she started massaging Sam's left calf. "I can give her a muscle relaxant. That should help. And sometimes massaging the remaining limb helps. Sam? How's it feeling now?"

"Better, thanks," she said.

"How long is this going to last? Is this something she'll deal with forever?"

"No, no. Maybe three to six months. And it shouldn't be a constant thing. When Sam starts physio, they'll discuss ways to trick the brain into thinking the leg is still there and mitigate the phantom pains."