𝙁𝙖𝙫𝙤𝙧𝙞𝙩𝙚 𝙎𝙩𝙧𝙖𝙣𝙜𝙚𝙧

29

Onism; The awareness of how little of the world you'll experience; the frustration of being stuck in just one body, that inhabits only one place at a time.

✮*•̩̩͙✧•̩̩͙*˚✧*˚　　˚*✧˚*•̩̩͙✧•̩̩͙*˚✮

Unknown: Happy birthday Ivy, and you know what they say; sometimes old habits never die.

This is another one of those 'I need a cigarette' moments, because I really do. It's not coincidence and I'm not stupid either, I know who it is.

"Hey, you okay?" River nudges me.

"Uhm, yeah, I just- I need to take a breather outside real quick. I'll be right back." I hop up from my seat and grab my jacket from one of the other chairs where I left it and make my way towards the back door.

Once I slip outside and move to the side of my house, I grab my lighter and pack of cigarettes out of my pocket. I pull one out and slip the pack back in my pocket before bringing it up between my lips and lighting it.

Drawing a slow breath in, I immediately feel less tense.

Sometimes old habits never die.

I don't know what his plan is or what he's trying to do, considering I haven't done shit to him, but he definitely planned this.

Maybe to mess with me, taunt me, I don't really know.

But there's a possibility he'll leave me alone if I figure out what the fuck he wants. But I don't want to go anywhere near him.

I slide down the side, sitting on the grass now. It's really chilly out tonight and it's only going to get colder considering it's the middle of November.

I hear the door and then I hear light footsteps getting closer. Letting out a breath when it's River who rounds the corner.

He sits down next to me with his legs out in front of him as mine are to my chest.

"I find it kind of cool we became close so fast." He says after a moment.

"Same." I put my cigarette out in the ground and set it next to me before turning my head to face him and resting it on my knees.

I know I do it a lot sometimes, but I love just looking at him. Seeing him here next to me calms me in way I've never felt before.

"I think I could be a writer with the amount of thoughts going through my head right now." He says while still looking forward.

"What are they?"

"I don't know how to say them."

"I get that." I reply softly.

"You look really gorgeous right now." He says, his eyes flitting over my face.

My lips twitch up as I try to suppress my smile because he definitely has already seen me blush too much in the past week.

"Are you staying the night?" I switch the subject.

"If it's an invitation then yes."