Burn out ✔️

Part 1

He saw how she was fighting against the tears that threatened to spill over soon but she obviously was determined to not let a single one slip. Well, that didn't work. After a few more seconds a few single tears ran down her cheeks as she continued to stare into the patient room. As she noticed Nick's gaze she looked at him for a few seconds before sinking her head to look at the floor, embarrassed about being so vulnerable in front of him. He laid an arm on her back to offer her some comfort before pulling her closer. She leaned her head against his cheek and they just stayed like this for a little while. Another minute passed before Meredith couldn't longer hold her emotions back and now fully leaned into his embrace, turning to lay her head on his shoulder, her face buried into his neck as he felt her tears dampen the edge of his scrub top. He felt bad for her. Today had been an extremely hard day for her, not only because of Bailey but also because this case obviously had brought back a lot of memories.

"Let's go home." He whispered into her ear, making her stand up again, but she was still not able to meet his gaze. He took her hand in his, not caring about anyone might seeing them while he led her to the attendings lounge that he now knew where it was and where her locker with her clothes was. He opened the door for her still aware of how she was shivering slightly and silent tears were still streaming down her cheeks. It was obvious that she was emotionally drained. The past few weeks with Hamilton offering her the job and now Bailey and Richard finding out couldn't have been easy. Especially not since Bailey had literally thrown at her face that she still saw her as the person she was all those years ago, that had now changed and developed but seemed to be unseen by Miranda Bailey, her mentor who almost had another heart attack today.

They both changed into their street clothes in silence, Nick not sure what to say and Meredith too far away with her thoughts. He opened his backpack that contained one additional pullover for emergencies that Meredith seemed to notice pretty quickly, looking at it but not able to get out a single word. Noticing her expression, he pulled it out and gave it to her without any further comments and she put it on, a tired and sad smile forming on her lips at how many sizes the pullover was too big for her, but not really being able to express her happiness about it because of how exhausted she was. Smiling brightly at how adorable she looked in his clothes he grabbed her purse and his backpack, laying it over his shoulder before taking her hand in his again.

They walked over the parking lot hand in hand, enjoying the slightly cold breeze on their skins since they both were pretty tired and overwhelmed. He opened the door of his car for her, helping her in before closing the door and getting in himself, putting their bags onto the backseat.

Just as before they kept staying in silence the whole ride to Meredith's house. She was starring out of the window and every time he would look at her his heart would break at seeing more silent tears making their way down her cheeks.

Arriving home, he again walked around the car to open the door for her before leading her to the front poach. "My keys- where's my purse." She asked, looking around confused. It seemed as if she really hadn't been able to notice anything going on around her while being so lost in her thoughts. "It's alright I got it." Nick replied quickly, pulling her a little closer to him before searching through her things in her purse for the keys. He quickly found them, opening the door and following her inside. They both took off their shoes.

"Do you want to eat something or just go to bed." He asked her as she just stood in the middle of the hallway as if she didn't know what to do next. "Bed?" she asked quietly, looking up at him. He smiled at her reassuringly before gesturing her to lead the way which she did slowly and somehow she seemed a little insecure about something. They walked up the stairs and through the small corridor into her bedroom where she sat down on the edge of the bed while he went over to her closet, getting her the grey sweatpants she had been wearing in the cabin and giving it to her.

"Do you want to change or keep on the pullover?" he asked her while changing into some pyjamas as well that he had left here the last time he had visited. She looked down herself as if she had already forgotten what she was wearing and all those little things that gave away how exhausted she was were the things that concerned him the most. A small simile appeared on her lips as she moved her arms around her midsection, holding onto the pullover, signalling him that she didn't want to take it off.

"I can leave it here if you want." He suggested as he sat down beside her on the bed, looking at her. Her cheeks were still wet and the tears hadn't stopped even now. She was still crying. And it seemed as if she couldn't stop.

At the words she looked up at him and a few more tears went down her cheeks that she quickly tried to wipe away. "When are you going back?" she asked tiredly but he couldn't longer just sit next to her while she was still crying so that he laid his hand on her arm, pulling her down onto the mattress with him, laying an arm around her waist and pulling her closer while she was looking up at him, waiting for him to answer.

"Tomorrow noon." He replied, now realising that he won't be able to just go when she would still feel like she did now tomorrow which was very likely to happen because feelings like that didn't just go away overnight. She just nodded, looking down and closing her eyes, trying to make the tears stop falling but it didn't work. Soon her pillow was just ass soaked as the pullover already was. "Do you want me to stay a few days longer?" he asked her, stroking her cheek and wiping away the fresh tears and like this also rubbing away the dried ones.

"No, it's okay." She whispered, looking down as suddenly her tears started to get more and more again. "I'm sorry, it just won't stop." She said, as she tried to wipe away all the tears running down her sore cheeks and they didn't want to get less and just continued welling up in her eyes. "Stop apologising." He said, rubbing her arm up and down again as she suddenly started sobbing, not being able to control her emotions anymore. He pulled her even closer, rubbing her back as she cried into his chest.

Now that she was letting everything out that she's been trying to shut down everything that happened in the past few weeks no crashed down onto her again. The fight with Bailey, their patient, the job offer and so many other little things. She cried for what felt like hours while he just held her, trying to be there for her.