Burn out ✔️

Part 10

Half an hour later they were at Meredith's house. She was upstairs packing a few things while Nick was downstairs, waiting for her. On their way out they had grabbed Meredith's new medication for her heart from the pharmacy and she had already taken it because she still hated flying and it would certainly get up her pulse again. She came down the stairs dressed in Nick's pullover, the one he had left her and a comfortable leggings, her suitcase in her hand.

At her sight Nick immediately begun to chuckle, walking over to her, taking the suitcase from her and placing it on the floor before pulling her into his arms. "You look adorable." He said, kissing her forehead as she giggled quietly as well. "You really feel up to flying Mer?" he asked a little concerned because she had told him about the plane crash and they had been on flights together before where she always had been a little scared.

"I need to get away from here, I'll be okay." She whispered, a small smile forming on her lips but it was still not reaching her eyes. She was sad. Deep inside of her there were dozens of sorrows buried that were slowly starting to eat her from the inside and it now also affected her physical as well as mental health. "Let's go." He said, taking her hand and suitcase, leading her out of the house, hoping that she would sleep a bit in the car. He had booked their flight last minute as soon as they had arrived at Meredith's house and their plane was taking off in two hours so that they still had enough time to drive to the airport. He really hoped that the time on the plane wouldn't stress her out even more and that she would be ale to get some sleep since she had been looking tired the whole day already. But there was still her fear of flying so he had no idea if she would be able to relax and if her poor heart could take it.

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Just like he had hoped she had fallen asleep in the car not two minutes after leaving the street where she lived. He kept looking over at her every few minutes, just not being able to stop himself. She looked so peaceful when she was asleep, as if there was nothing on her mind, nothing worrying her or stressing her out. Luckily she stayed asleep the whole thirty-minute ride until they arrived at the airport and he parked her car in a parking lot close to the entry where the car would be safe to stay for a few days.

"Mer, we're at the airport." He said, gently rubbing her shoulder to wake her up. She sleepily opened her eyes before unbuckling her seatbelt and opening the door as he did the same. He got her suitcase and his backpack out of the trunk while she put on her jacket although it was pretty warm outside. He didn't question her actions but just grabbed her hand as they walked hand in hand into the lobby where they quickly got rid of the luggage before making their way into the waiting area.

"Do you want to eat something?" he asked as they sat down in two chairs that were positioned to look outside onto the landing- and start runway where they observed a few people, some busses and planes taking off or landing. "Not really." Meredith said, laying her head on his shoulder as he laid his arm around her shoulders. It wasn't exactly quiet in the lobby but it wasn't too loud either so that Meredith was able to relax a little to make sure her heart wouldn't be put at risk.

"What do you think about we spend the night at my house and drive to the cabin tomorrow, I really don't want to drive at night it's not very safe." Nick said after a while, telling her about what was on his mind. He didn't want anything to happen to them and thought it would probably be better to wait until tomorrow morning when they would have more energy again since this was already his second flight today and Meredith seemed to be pretty tired constantly. "Sounds good." Meredith said absently, no emotion in her voice.

"What's on your mind?" he asked carefully, squeezing her shoulder slightly. "It just feels so unreal. Everything that's happening... it wasn't supposed to be like this." She whispered, her gaze fixed onto a plane that was currently being loaded with luggage. "I know that- things change and-" but she trailed off, not sure how to finish the sentence. "I-" she tried a second time but she again couldn't finish her thought.

She was completely out of it. Her mind was so far away he was pretty sure she wouldn't even be scared on the plane at all because she wouldn't be able to think about it. There was so much going on inside of her that she wasn't able to concentrate on anything else. She couldn't really talk to him, she couldn't take in her surroundings and he knew that if he would ask her what time it was she wouldn't be able to tell him.

They continued to sit like this for a while. Nick had no idea how to help her and suddenly he started doubting if this really was a good idea. Maybe she just needed sleep, maybe she just needed to feel safe, maybe she needed someone to tell her that everything was going to be okay. But he didn't know if everything was going to be okay. She didn't move a single inch so that he also didn't knew if she had fallen asleep again or if she was just deep in her thoughts. He felt helpless, he had no idea what was going on inside of her and he didn't know if it would get better by itself or if she would need help, more help than he could offer.

Maybe it was wrong and he should have just made her stay in the hospital for a while because now he felt responsible. If anything would happen to her he would be responsible. "Nick?" he suddenly heard her say.

"Yeah?" he asked, relieved that she was talking to him again. "Thank you." She said quietly and suddenly a small smile appeared on his lips. "For what?" he asked, rubbing her back a little as she kept resting her head on his shoulder. "Everything." She replied, not really having the strength to go into detail so that he just answered: "Nothing to thank for." Before softly kissing her temple.

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Half an hour later they were sitting in the plane. He had covered the window to prevent any further stress factors or triggers that could increase Meredith's pulse. But like he had predicted she didn't even pay attention to the fact that she was currently sitting in a plane. He could see it in her eyes, they were unfocused and empty. It took her a while until she blinked a few times and looked around as if her legs had just carried her into the plane without her mind noticing. But she tried to act as if she wasn't confused how she had got into her seat at the window with Nick to her left. She looked up at him, meeting his gaze.

"Everything okay?" he asked concerned, taking her hand in his as she just nodded. As suddenly the stewardess begun to speak Meredith flinched as she felt her heart starting to beat faster and her breathing got a little irregular. Nick was highly alarmed and almost instinctively pulled her into him. "I''s okay, you're safe. I'm right here." He said, kissing her head again as she continued to breath rather fast. While continuing to talk to her, trying to calm her down he took her left hand and looked at her smart watch, measuring her pulse. It was at 122.

"You need to take slow and deep breaths Meredith, everything's alright." He said, trying to soothe her a little as she finally started to calm down again. "I'm okay." She whispered, not moving out of his arms that were still wrapped around her. "You're okay." He echoed, laying his cheek on top of her head, holding her close. Now he doubted even more if this really was a good idea.