CherryLatte

Outside Conversations

Tash was standing in front of a family portrait. She was half amused, half fond of it.

"Miss Tasha, have you sent in your final essay?"

"Ah, professor. I'll send it in by morning."

"I hope you're not waiting until the last minute to finish it. What if I had not given the extension?"

"No, I am finished. But I've spent so much time looking at it for the past two days. I thought I'd clear my head tonight and go back and look at it with fresh eyes."

"Well, I look forward to reading it."

"Thank you."

*

"What was that about?" Mei popped up, almost immediately.

"Jesus where did you come from?" Tash said, regaining her composure. "She was asking about my final."

"Shit! Is she your teacher?" Mei was thoroughly amused.

Tash, "Yeah"

Mei, "Does she know about you and K?"

Tash, "I don't know for sure... She always gives me a look or say something in like a hostile way. If I didn't know any better, I'd say she hates me."

Mei, "she probably does."

Tash's head shot up in attention, "What? Why? Keva said there's nothing between them. Surely, she's not that petty."

Mei was short and precise in her answer, patting Tash on the arm. "She is."

Tash scoffed out, "What are you saying? She has to give me my final grade. I'm graduating for god's sake."

Mei, "Goodluck"

Tasha was left standing bemused.

Mei had trailed off to look at the family portrait. "I hate this fucking picture"

This had regained Tash's attention. "Why?" she inquired. "They look good, in an awkward family way." She smiled looking at a teenage Keva squished between his parents.

"That's exactly what they want people to think," Mei spat out. "Two hours before this portrait was done, that stupid boy was crying in my house."

Tash's face flooded with concern as she turned to look at Mei, wondering what she was talking about. "Why?"

"This was done the day we were graduating high school. We spent the night before celebrating at my house and decided to do something fun to mark the event. I don't know what we were thinking but we decided we would be super cool if we dyed our hair." There was a hint of a smile on Mei's face. "I did pink, Keva did blue, and Sam did green. We thought we would look so cool in our graduation pictures," she shook her head and her smile disappeared.

"The next morning, he showed up at my house. He had to undo it. All I remember is tears running down his face as I dyed his hair back to black again."

How Mei's face went from a smile, to no smile to disgust had alarmed Tash. "These people would have to believe everything is perfect. Hanging up their family picture and labeling their exhibit 'Family and Legacy' like it means something to them."

What can Tash say to any of this? She had no idea. Suddenly Mei had squeezed her upper arm.

"If you love him, tell him. Please. He is about to make a big change in his life. He will need something to hold on to."

Tash only nodded in response. It wasn't a nod of approval. It was a nod of 'I'm still processing' but Mei took it as a relief and walked away as if she couldn't bear to stand here anymore.

Tasha's eyes immediately went searching for Keva. She found him but found that he was busy. Engrossed in conversation with a few other people. She felt so stuffy she headed outside.

All Tash needed was some fresh air. The corridor just outside the entrance seemed like a place one would go to take a beat. She headed straight there but instead bumped into two ladies chattering. Guess she wasn't the only one who needed some air. Luckily the corridor was big enough for more than 3 people to comfortably breathe fresh air. So, Tash put enough distance between her and the two women. Enough space so that it wasn't awkward or seemed like she wanted to mind their business. Not that they seemed to care. They were so engrossed in whatever they were saying they didn't even seem to notice her. Was it gossip? Maybe if she heard some sweet gossip, it might take her mind off of everything Mei just said. Somehow, she felt responsible for something now. But responsible for what?

"...proud of him. He always does the right thing in the end"

"Children are like that. You have to give them some time and freedom. They find their way back eventually."

Ah! What else would two middle aged women be talking about. Of course, their children. Not that Tash meant to overhear but no one else was out here. The acoustics were excellent. Sometimes you hear when you're not even listening. She found herself not wanting to hear but listening.

"My daughter was telling me he's spending his time elsewhere these days. It looks like you got him back on the right track like you always do."

And sometimes on rare occasions you find yourself compelled to hear and listen.

"I knew someday he would have to replace his father. I watched his father spend all of his youth dedicated to building something. Most of the time I had to bear the brunt of those ambitions."

"You put up with a lot."

"Why does a woman do anything? For family. I let my son live a little. Give him some freedom so that it won't be so hard on him. Who he used to spend his time with is his choice. But now he will need a woman to stand by his side. One who knows and understands the world he lives in and who he has to be."

"I've known you for years. I know you already have someone in mind."

"Wahhh you know how to play innocent"

Only the two women seemed to find this funny. Tash grew uneasy the more she listened.

"Have you spoken to him about Laryn?"

"Keva might pretend to be the fool but he is not foolish. He will accept her. She is the right one for him. She knows this world. They grew up in it together. She knows that a woman has to stand besides her husband in public and hold him together in private."

"And what a pretty picture they will make in public. I felt so happy seeing them together this afternoon when he came to pick us up at home."

Tasha recognized one of the women as soon as she bumped into them when she came out. She had just spent the last 10 minutes staring at her in the portrait inside. Who Keva's mother was talking to she did not know...at first.

Even though she heard the names, she hoped she'd misheard. Maybe the acoustics out here weren't that good after all. Maybe you don't have to listen every time you hear something. Maybe it's better to mind your own business because as long as you hear, the one thing you cannot do is un-hear.

She wished she was mad. She wanted so badly to be mad at what she just heard. Why wasn't she angry at the fact that he went to pick up another woman while he sent a friend to pick her up?

Anger is a surface emotion. It shows on your face and in your actions. She could storm inside right now and shout and scream and slap him across the head. That emotion she knows how to deal with. But she didn't feel like doing any of that. 

How does she deal with the way she felt her heart sinking inside her right now? How do you fix what's broken inside? How do you gather the pieces before they crumble? 

(￣_￣|||)