How To Polish A Pearl

Chapter 99 - The Assassin (1)

Author's Notes:

As if I would leave you hanging for a week just because some of you are rioting? ❤

Warning for triggers around drowning. Also, this chapter contains violence, self-destructive behavior and some references to sex.

Hold on tight to the handlebars, because this ride isn't stopping for anything.

⊂ (▀▿▀) つ

The moment Zhou Zi Shu's back hits the water, his two lives merges inside his mind. His entire life now rolls out before him—on fast forward mode. His first fifteen years moves past so fast it is but a blur but not anything he had forgotten anyway. The year he had spent with Wen Ke Xing by his side goes by faster than he would like, unable to pick out more than bits and pieces.

Oh~ Ah-Xing. I wish I could see more of our time together. Maybe I will get to keep my memories when I reach the yellow spring (1). If I am damned to spend eternity in Diyu (1), maybe I can keep the light in my memories throughout all levels of hell. Ah-Xing, let's do our next lives together instead of apart.

When his body contracts for the first time, cramping in panic from lack of oxygen, the life he has forgotten slows down. In slow motion he relives certain parts of the life that had been blurred up until now.

Zhou Zi Shu sees himself standing in front of his Shifu's spirit tablet (2). The images flicker in front of him and he sees himself pour the tea over the shrine with everyone's eyes locked on the young new leader. He hadn't even been able to say goodbye to his Shifu, who had passed away suddenly when Zhou Zi Shu had been away. He was always away.

With his Shifu gone, so was the only person that had known about Wen Ke Xing. Alone with nothing but his memories, Zhou Zi Shu sometimes wondered if it had all been a dream. The desperation he felt ran so deep, he would spend hours training, just to get some control over himself. He couldn't fall apart. Everyone was looking to him for guidance. He was the new sect leader and he had eighty one men and women under him to care for. Though he wasn't someone's Shifu, he was still their Zhuang zhu. The weight he had on his shoulders at the age of sixteen was crushing him, some nights he struggled to breathe through the huge lump of loss in his heart.

When his cousin had sent for him, he'd had his suspicion on what might be on the agenda. And he had been right. His cousin Helian Yi, was the Prince of Jin and he had a strong vision of where he wanted to go and how to get there. The man was power hungry. Zhou Zi Shu hadn't seen his true nature from the start, too deep in his loss, and when he had figured it out it had been so long that he didn't really care.

When Helian Yi had proposed the idea that Zhou Zi Shu come work for him, his first—and only—reaction had been relief. He knew he was selfish. It would not only distract him from his thoughts and give him purpose every day, but it would give him an opportunity for access to more power and more knowledge. Anything, to get him closer of finding Wen Ke Xing.

No one at Four Seasons Manor had questioned his decision to uproot everyone, move to the Capital in northern Jin (3) and found the Window of Heaven. He wasn't sure if they chose to ignore the fact that they were in essence turning from the martial arts world and into an assassination organization, or if they were actually just following him blindly. They all adored their young Zhuang zhu. He had always been skilled, intelligent and with a strong sense of justice. Thanks to his passion for reading, he had inhaled all the books in their vast library. He had spent his youth wisely cultivating, training and reading and as a young leader, his knowledge base was equal to any of the elders. They all respected him and would have followed him to the end of the earth. It was just that he changed. Year after year of doing someone else's bidding, changed him.