Love The One You're With

Chapter 20-Let's Dance

Quinn's POV

The light pouring in through my bedroom window felt harsher than normal as I woke up begrudgingly. My head was throbbing and I was extremely thirsty. I rolled over to check my phone and saw Sam sleeping peacefully beside me. Fuck. I had been halfway hoping last night had been a dream, but seeing Sam's lean, lanky body sprawled across my bed let me know that it was real. I knew I should tell him that Jake and I hadn't actually broken up, but he looked so peaceful right now and I was already going to be late for my 8 am class. I crawled out of bed, grabbed some Tylenol from my nightstand, chased it with a full glass of water from the sink, and threw on a pair of sweats and a cropped hoodie before slipping on my vans and heading out the door.

During my entire hasty walk to class, I mentally recited all the different ways the conversation with Jake could possibly go. Would he apologize for blowing me off? Maybe. Would he do it with some kind of grand gesture? Also maybe. Did I even deserve an apology after hooking up with his brother? Not really. I felt like I was walking to the gallows as the biology building loomed ahead of me. I had made up my mind that I would tell Jake today. He needed to know about me and Sam, and he needed to know it was not Sam's fault. I felt nauseous when I opened the front door to walk inside and thought about bailing... Jake deserved better than that, though.

I took my usual seat near the front and tried desperately to calm my racing heart as it pounded in my chest. Every time someone walked in, I would turn around in my seat to see if it was my handsome, brown-haired boyfriend. Each time it wasn't him, a wave of relief would wash over me quickly followed by a rush of anger. If he didn't want to talk to me, that's perfectly fine. Two could play that game.

After my art class, I made my way home, internally preparing an apology, but nothing sounded good enough...not for Sammy. My guilt was already weighing me down and eating away at me, but I was terrified to see his reaction. I couldn't bear the thought of hurting him...

When I walked in, Sam was standing proudly in the kitchen in a pair of gray sweats and completely covered in flour. He grinned from ear to ear when he saw me, and my heart melted. "Hey, Quinnie, I missed you this morning!" his smile never faltered as he spoke. He was so happy, maybe now was not the time to tell him... I shook the thought from my head, resolving to get it over with as quickly as possible.

"Hi, Sammy...we need to talk," I began solemnly. His smile dropped momentarily as he wiped his hands on his thighs, leaving dusty white handprints behind.

"You're right," he said with a sigh as he positioned himself between my legs, the corners of his mouth curling into a slight smile once more. "I know last night was spontaneous, and probably not the best decision at the time, but I don't regret it," he said nervously as he raked his fingers through his hair before letting one hand rest on my thigh. His other hand gingerly reached up and caressed my cheek before he whispered, "You make me happy, Quinnie, and I know that I can make you happy, too."

Shit. How was I supposed to follow that with "I'm still dating your brother, sorry for lying"? I guess one more night couldn't do any more damage. He quickly closed the distance between us, gently pressing his soft lips into mine as his hand glided around to the back of my neck pulling me closer. My hands found the bare skin of his back and my fingertips dug in lightly as his tongue slid into my mouth. I hated how easy he made it to just be with him.

Last night I had been so upset and hurt by Jake not prioritizing me that I wasn't thinking clearly. I had unfairly clung to Sam because he felt like a safe space where all the hurt, pain, and anxiety just dissipated. I knew it was wrong and that this would ultimately come back to bite me, but something about being with him felt right.