Insatiably You | l.s.

Chapter 12

Even though this chapter is a sad one it would feel wrong not to dedicate one to you after all your comments. This is a longer one so I hope you enjoy it even though it's not the nicest one.

Very triggering chapter to some people (SH). I genuinely apologise for writing these things but it is crucial for the story. With that in mind read at your own risk, and if you need to skip it please do, your health is more important than a story even though this is one of the MOST important chapters. For those who are skipping please comment here that you skipped so I can DM you what happened if you would like. With that in mind, I hope you enjoy it nonetheless...it's not very graphic but still can trigger a few so be careful :) xx

With our laboured breaths mingling and us almost panting into the other's mouth, I silently stare into his eyes, begging him to break the building tension surrounding us. 

With every passing second, in his arms, the air around us seems to get thicker and heavier just like our breathing. His eyes lock onto mine in the most cliche way possible and it was like that night all over again.

That night where our unexplainable bond had been formed, and the night all my reasoning went out the window. 

The last thing I seemed able to remember before we got here, was standing with Louis, in our shared bathroom with him giddily spinning me in a circle, without a care in the world, trying to help me forget all that had previously happened. We were in that same position from before, with his arms around me. But unlike then, when we had not a care in the world, now, we had the weight of it on our shoulders, with the consequences of our actions catching up to us.

Our faces were almost touching except for a pale, thin ray of moonlight cast between us from an open window, as our synchronized breaths mingled with each other. 

It occurred to me that both of us had been ever so slowly bending towards each other the entire time we were here, as though subconsciously waiting for our lips to meet. 

It was as though my entire being was made up of flora instead of fauna, and that he was the very sunlight needed for my survival at that moment. 

With every flutter of his eyelashes and every teasing kiss of his minty breath on my face, I found myself inching closer to him, just wanting to close the tormenting gap between us. Just wanting, to rid the taunting moonlight from between us and instead be burdened with the feeling of fire on my skin due to his radiating sunshine. 

All my time spent with him in the bathroom, caused these thoughts to race through my mind; silently begging myself and him to attain this desired proximity. 

"Please kiss me, Lou," I whispered not daring to break the carefully crafted moment we created, but needing to let him know how badly I wanted him.

However, even when I saw all his walls crumbling down and him leaning in, where his lips just barely rested on mine, he began to find all composure again, backing away.

His arms left me. His warmth was doused. His walls were rebuilt. And his once boyish expression was replaced with a more calculated and careful one, with ample space now created between us.

"You-You should get showered, it's getting late," he rasped, barely able to maintain eye contact with me.

He then left the bathroom, leaving me to fend for myself, with our moment going as quickly as it came.

Fuck, I thought. I knew I had pushed him too far this time. 

I just wanted to forget all that had happened with Axel, I never want to admit what did in fact happen, and I thought the easiest way to do this was to feel Louis' body on mine again, no matter how wrong the situation was.