Yellow Raincoat

14 | Invitation

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"Everywhere I go my shadow, it follows behind. Doesn't matter where I travel, my shadow, it finds me. Something that I've come to realize after all this time. I can't escape my shadow, I can't escape my shadow. It won't ever let me go. It goes everywhere I go"

Shadow of Mine ((Un)Commentary)

HANNAH

As soon as I hung up the phone, I ran to the bathroom and threw up.

It reminded me of that night I'd met Matt. I had been in this exact position as soon as I had gotten back home. Only this time, my heart was obliterated at what he'd just told me. This time, I had listened to a man I cared about as he told me about the terrible shit that had happened to him.

It had shaken me to my core to have witnessed a stranger being raped that night. Tonight, though, I felt broken. Listening to him detail what they'd done to him had broken my heart.

He'd been so silent at first that I feared I had pushed him too far and he had hung up on me. Then, he'd spoken...telling me so much.

Fuck.

My heart thumped loudly in my chest. A memory of his cries flashed in my head as I gripped the sink tightly. I didn't notice the tears flowing down my cheeks until a soft cry escaped me.

I wanted to book a flight to where he was just so I could bring him into my arms and maybe try to siphon his pain away.

I couldn't do that, though.

Mainly because that would be crazy to just show up without his knowledge. But also because I don't think I could afford a plane ticket right now. I could ask my parents, but I'm pretty sure they would just side-eye me for asking for money only so I could visit a guy and then say no.

No, I would have to wait until tomorrow to see him. There was a small part of me that feared he would feel too exposed and cancel on me tomorrow. I would completely understand if he did so, but that was the last thing I wanted.

Nodding to myself, I got up and brushed my teeth. When I went to the kitchen to get some water, Chloe and Garrett were still cuddled up and asleep. The sight brought a slight comfort to my saddened heart. Not wanting to disrupt their peace, I quickly grabbed water and went back to my room.

My brain was too frazzled to do anything school-related, so I put on Friends to take my mind off Matt and cuddled into myself under the covers.

It was a long time before I fell asleep.

***

The next morning, I had gotten up bright and early. I was so nervous that I ended up making both Garrett and Chloe breakfast and lunch to get rid of some of the pent-up energy. They were both still sleeping, so I left a small note for Chloe letting her know where I was going and leaving the apartment.

It didn't take me long to make it to Sheeps and Goats. I got both of our regulars and waited for him at our usual table by the corner. He'd texted me about an hour ago that he and his teammates had landed safely.

A couple of minutes later, I felt the hair on the back of my neck stand up and I knew immediately he was here. I looked up from my phone, catching sight of him entering the cafe.

My eyes watered at the view of him, blurring my vision. I couldn't even focus on how good he looked. I was so happy to see him. It finally dawned on me how much I had missed him and he was only gone for one day.