Yellow Raincoat

3 | Captain

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"I thought I was strong, thought I was made of stone, but suddenly the lonely hit. You think you know the part you play until somebody goes and rewrites the script. It felt like falling, but it's funny 'cause I never touched the ground again"

~ Wild Blue (Wild Blue, Part I)

HANNAH

I threw up.

As soon as I got home, I ran to the bathroom and let it all out. I was so confused by what I saw, yet so sure at the same time. Everything felt muddled and I didn't know how to make sense of it. I fell on the floor hanging on to the bathtub as I coughed to try and clear my throat.

I was trying to breathe slowly to calm my body when my phone dinged. I was sitting on the bathroom floor, waiting for my body to react to those images in my head once again. When nothing came, I groaned, turning to see who'd texted.

Hey, I'm gonna (don't yell at me!) spend the night with Garrett. Don't wait up, love you!

I sniffed, letting out another cough to clear my throat. I thanked Garrett silently for taking Chloe out tonight. I was such a mess right now and I knew she would interrogate me for answers if she saw me. I wasn't ready for that.

She had let me know she was leaving with Garrett moments after I left his room. I was so lost in my thoughts I didn't even give her my mace. Even now, my mind was so full of confused and alarmed thoughts that I couldn't focus on anything substantive.

Instead, I forced myself to get up then brush my teeth and take a shower. I guess I thought maybe the water would help wash the horror of tonight away. I don't know.

I don't think it helped.

When the shower didn't work, I brought my laptop and notes out to the living room. I reheated my coffee from earlier and sat back down on the couch. I put on some random TV channel for background noise, trying to immerse myself in my schoolwork for tomorrow.

I fought and fought my own thoughts, dragging them away from the topic of tonight. I studied for hours, forcing myself to focus and hone in on memorizing even the smallest and low yield details.

Around midnight, though, my caffeine high dropped. I could no longer keep up the facade of forcing myself to ignore what happened tonight.

Images of what I saw flashed into my mind, confusion taking over. I mean, I know what I saw.

It should be simple. Right?

A groan escaped me as I pushed my fingers through my hair.

Maybe I should check if he's alright. I said I would anyway, so what's the harm, right?

Right.

Nodding to myself, I took in a deep breath. I found his number and shot him a text before I could overthink my decision.

Hey. This is the girl who checked on you earlier. How are you feeling?

It took about a minute for him to start typing.

I'm doing good, thank you for checking on me.

Instantly, the breath I was holding left me.