Submerged (doctor who novel)

fork in the road

chapter editing completed!
tw--visions/memory flashback, crowded spaces,mute episode.
______________________________________
"They're....they're coming."
My voice quivered and my hands shook furiously,my eyes now open wide with fear and shock.I knew the name..somehow.It had always been somewhere in my mind,waiting for the reveal,and the alien- the judoon:a large rhinoceros standing on two feet in a black space suit,was searching for someone.They came in platoons,following a large mother ship on larger tasks.
My eyes kept glitching and flickering between the vision and a memory.I didn't know how I knew,but I did.It was memory.And that scared me more than anything in the universe.
I kept seeing it,over and over, everytime I blinked,it was driving me mad.
The doctor tried to search my pupils for recognition he was there,and part of me saw him;the terror and fear for me shadowing him,but the most of me was stuck in the depths of the memory;a black abyss,forever expanding and with no escape out,absorbing my whole conciousness,second by second.
I felt dizzy;like I would pass out without warning,and I stumbled as I attempted to gain my stand.
I was screaming in my head,"please don't leave me,please don't leave me alone."The doctor must have heard because a wince pulled across his face as if my thoughts were so loud it physically hurt and deafened him.This made them grow all the more intense so I kept my view away from him as to direct the sound also,away from him,leaving just a crying echo.Rarely did we let ourselves be this emotional in a serious situation but i suppose with my mental state, it was inevitable.
Before,I had been able to control the volume of my mind.But right now I had lost all sense of reality.I just screamed and screamed and screamed,hoping for a response from someone I knew,someone familiar,but not from now.Someone I knew to be able to let me have some peice of explanation on who I was,who I am.The Doctor tried his hardest to be that person but even he didn't know truly.

As I stood still,abruptly,on the spot,the doctors hands skimmed over my arms and back and sides of my face,unsure of what to do,fumbling with panic,and I didn't even blink,tears tipping over the edges of my eyes and rolling down my face.
There was a look of frozen dread on my features and as I tried to talk.Not a stutter- not even a whimper,came out.
I gently pulled myself away from him,walking out of the ward,leaving the apprehensive doctor to follow me.I needed him close but didn't know how to tell him.Even the link we usually had to exchange short words to eachother telapathically had seemed to fail and I was completely alone.My periferal was blocked by a fade of darkness;tunnel sight,and so I kept my gaze forwards in an attempt to scavenge what little sanity I could of the situation,my breath heavy and the lack of continuous oxygen not helping my already fading sight.
The visions had stopped now,but remained engrave in my conscience,sending waves of fright every time I blinked.
I walked back to my hospital bed and attempted to unzip the small rucksack at the foot of the thin,white covers.my hands trembled too violently and I couldn't even hold the zip without it jerking and falling back to the beginning.
The doctor pushed past me slightly;to let me know he was there,and quietly said,"here,I'll do it."his voice was softened and careful,making me fall at ease and take a deep breath.I could still feel his anxiety but he was more of sad for me,wishing he could help.I hated him seeing me in a state.
He let me take what I needed once I had free access to the content and I swallowed down some calming medication,taking my inhaler from the side pocket and handing it to the doctor seen as I had no pockets in the fresh hospital gown I had been changed into.
I walked to the window after a few minutes of just standing there,the doctor staring at me, wondering if I would say something or do something.I had noticed the medicine start to kick in and began to feel drowsy.It was like a breath of air,not cold and refreshing air,but warm air. letting the sight of my surroundings outside the hospital process did not cause me to jump or gasp or have any sort of external reaction that was visible to anyone when I saw the unexpected rotation of the earth from the moon's point of view.
But....no way.
We couldn't be.
The sky was a midnight black,stars scattered at various distances,looking close enough to almost reach and clearer than ever possible on the polluted blue planet.
The ground we had landed on was uneaven and I felt the slightest tilt in the building, throwing my sense of direction off completely.
The horizon was a gray,crater-filed planet.
We were on the moon.
The landscape was beautiful and I wished I could admire it but my whole body continued to shake and I got frustrated standing in one place at a time.
I had to move,I had to run and get away from the judoon,that was all I knew.I didn't dare tell the doctor who was coming.I didn't tell anyone.
exiting my ward,I began to continue down the corridors again.I was blinking by now,more alive rather than just a stone statue or porcelain doll,and I don't know if the doctor heard,but my mind went completely silent.