Wildcard

5

Wildcard 5

Olivia's POV:

After the kiss I shared with Alex I felt incredibly guilty. I mean it was wonderful and as much as I've missed Alex I know it was wrong. Which is why I'm sitting here on the couch waiting for you to come home. My stomach is in knots while I wait. Of course, the idea of Alex joining us has been up for discussion. However, I've made a play without you. And if the roles were reversed you'd be receiving a punishment.

The door opening draws me out of my thoughts. I watch you walk in kicking off your heels and dropping your bags off by the door. Rounding the corner a big smile spreads across your face when you notice me.
"Hi."
"Hey, baby. Did you have a good day?" I asked.
"Yeah, it was good. We had a prep rally today due to the early dismissal so the kids were in rare form but it was nice to see them so excited and happy."

"That's good."
"Yeah. How was your day?" you asked taking a seat in my lap?
"Umm, it was alright. But I need to talk to you about something."
"Alright?"
I breathed deeply before I start. "The other night when Alex was here we sat in the living room for a while once I got you comfortable in bed."
"Ok?"
"We um... Well, I...I kissed her."
"You kissed her?"
"Yes."
"W..why?" you asked with hesitation.

I shake my head as a few tears spill from my eyes.
"I'm not sure. Maybe we were just caught up in the moment or maybe it's because when we left things it wasn't resolved. I'm not sure. But I feel awful and I didn't want to lie to you. I know how hard it's been for you to open up to the idea of Alex and...i...I'm sorry."

You were quiet for a moment but it felt like an eternity. I kept my gaze low as I waited for you to respond.
You breathed heavily "Okay. Well umm...Thank you for being honest with me."

I looked up in disbelief. How could you be so calm about this?
As if you could read my mind you continued.
"I know that isn't the response you expected but honestly, right now I'm not sure how to respond. "

"I understand. I umm...I really am sorry y/n. I didn't mean to hurt you. And I...I'm sorry I put you in this position."

You nod giving me a small smile. "I know."

Shaking my head I cried harder. "I don't deserve you."

You gently lifted my chin with your finger placing a gentle kiss on my lips.
"I wouldn't go that far. We're human we make mistakes. But now we have to figure out where to go from here."

"What do you mean?"

"I'm not sure yet. But it's been a long day for both of us and I'd really like to take a nice hot bath wrapped in your arms. It's all I've thought about all day. And then we will go to sleep and deal with this tomorrow."

I nod my head leaning to give you another kiss. "I love you."
"I love you too," you whispered taking my hand as you lead me to our bedroom.

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Reader's POV:

When you left work this afternoon you had no idea that this is what you'd be walking into. Of course, you knew Olivia had feelings for Alex once upon a time but you didn't think she'd act on them. Olivia has never given you a reason before not to trust her but now...well now you weren't so sure. On one hand, you feel it would be dramatic to make a big deal about it. You did just have sex with Alex but Olivia was there. And there has been talk of the three of you being together so it would be silly to make a big deal out of it. On the other hand, you were upset and hurt that Olivia did it at all. That she kept it from you for days, before working up the courage to tell you.

You weren't an idiot you knew that the two had a history and their chemistry is off the charts. However, the thought of Olivia doing something without you being involved worried you. After the two of you, talked you decided you needed time to think. Even though you were upset with Olivia you craved being close to her. The two of you shared a nice bath before crawling into bed giving each other goodnight kisses. While the brunette slept you laid wide awake thinking about your next move.

Although you have grown fond of Alex you were worried. If you didn't agree to this relationship would Olivia feel as if she had to choose? Would she choose you? And if she did would she regret her decision in the long run? Would she blame you for her unhappiness? All of these what if's swarmed your brain throughout the night as you prayed for sleep.

Olivia is scheduled to work around noon even though it's a Saturday that was the life of a captain in SVU. When you woke up you decide to tell Olivia your decision. Walking into the kitchen you found her sitting at the table drinking her coffee and reading the paper as she did every morning if she had the time. Quietly you walked to the chair next to her taking a seat.
"Good morning baby." she smiles.
"Good morning. Can we talk before you head out?" you asked.
She drops her paper turning in her seat to face you.
"Of course."
"I had some time to think and...I think that we should take things to the next step with Alex."
Olivia's eyes grow wide. "Really?"
"Yes. I mean we've already crossed the line and I told you I'd think about it. If we can I'd like to take it slow. I know you know her very well but I don't. So I'd like to have a dating period so to speak."
"Whatever you want."

You smiled letting out a sigh before you continued.
"Olivia. I'm still angry with you. I've tried not to be but I am. I like Alex and I like that you have someone else that you enjoy being with. I'm willing to take the next step but please don't leave me out of things. I want to be included and respected. Don't hide things from me."

"I won't. I know I fucked up. And I'm so sorry. I didn't mean for it to happen."

"I know."

"Are you sure this is something you want?" she asked.
You stared at her as she waited for your response. "This is your chance. If you have something to say the time is now." you think to yourself.
You smiled nodding your head "Yes. I'm sure."
Her smile grows wide as she leans over to kiss you.
"I'll call Alex and let her know. Once we have a free day we can all meet to go over some ground rules. And I promise you I'll be clear that anything that goes on must be done with all three of us involved."

You nod your head giving her a small smile. "Okay."
"Okay. Well I've got to go but I will see you later," she says getting up from her chair.
"See you tonight." you smiled as she kissed your cheek.
"Bye baby."
"Bye," you whispered as she walked out the door.
Hearing the door fully close you dropped your head to the table as tears rolled down your cheeks.

A couple of hours later Delana arrived for lunch. The two of you talked about the kiss and the agreement you made with Olivia.
"I don't know y/n. Are you sure you'll be okay with this?"
You shrugged your shoulders. "What choice do I have?"
"She asked if you were sure."
"I know but you don't get it. You haven't seen the two of them together. They are in love with each other. Whatever happened that night lit a flame in both of them. I'm not going to ask her to choose."
"Why?"
"Because I'm not sure I'll like the answer," you whispered your voice cracking.  Delana sighed reaching over to squeeze your shoulder.
You sniffled shaking your head.
"At least this way I still get to be with her. And I mean Alex isn't bad. The sex was great. I'll be okay."
Delana nods giving you a soft smile. "I hope so."