Venting About Books and Stuff

17 (bad) facts about the author

I'm just gonna wing this: I am bored. Therefore, I am making a list of things I do. Have fun? (This gets worse and worse btw, you should probably start hating me now before it gets even worse <33)

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1. This is basically how my ego works. Whenever I look into the mirror specifically at night, I'm always like, "hey, I look kinda good!". But then, whenever I look into the mirror literally any other time of the day, my mindset is, "ugh, why do I look so bad?".

I don't know what it is that makes me feel this way? I guess the night is just a big ego booster for me lol

Moral of the story? Get a glow up at 1 am, you won't regret it. /j

2. Whenever I wake up, the honest to god first thing I do is, like, pop my ears?? No idea how this habit developed, but it's a thing. It's not popping your ears by plugging your nose or yawning or any of that. It's like... uh... popping your cheekbone? How do I describe it?

Eh, it's strange and it's a habit I've started to pick up. (I think it happened this one time I was sick, and my ear got plugged up and it's never felt the same?)

Kinda like clearing your throat a lot (I actually also do that!), but with your ears/jawbone. 

I have little to no explanation for this, but it feels... nice???

3. I don't sleep when I need to. No further explanation needed.

4. I get sucked into binge watching shows and SMPs and other shit and I lose touch with the outside world. I mean, I guess this happens to other people?

Yesterday morning I was happily bingeing Gravity Falls, and then I went outside because my brother had a playdate, and I was just plain confused. I was drifting along in a cloud of fog, like a dream. Maybe I'm just sleep deprived?

And then later in the day, I was bingeing X Life (out of order though xox). My mom made me come with her to pick up dinner, and I could not for the life of me function normally. I couldn't really feel anything??

Basically, the screen will be my ultimate demise and I am slowly losing any kind of self-responsibility or awareness for other people.

5. I get random deja vu sometimes? I don't know, it just happens. Like, I'm doing one thing and the next moment everything feels strangely familiar. Maybe it's nostalgia, but I don't think so, because this has happened at very weird times.

6. The sun makes me sad. If you read my poem book, and you've seen the one called Summertime, then just know that that (ugh, I hate it when your writing turns out like this) poem connects to this.

Whenever I am in the nice, warm sun, it makes me feel, just, super nostalgic. I have no explanation. The sun has always done this to me.

wHy SuN, wHy

7. I wish a lot of things on people, and most of them are... bad. And I never really mean it in the end either, so I just end up feeling bad most of the time.

8. I believe in god out of spite. No explanation provided.

9. I set myself up for disappointment all the time. I just push through life with a negative, "I'm going to fail", mindset, and then when I end up doing things semi well it's a nice surprise. Eh. It works.

10. I once harmed myself in my sleep. 

Now, I don't know what I do when I am asleep. But one time I woke up and there was just a fucking cut on my shoulder. Don't know what the hell happened, but I did clip my nails after that?

Basically, I somehow accidently gave myself a scar while I was asleep. I mean, it's kinda fading, but it was a deepish cut. How? Why? When? Where? I don't know, answer me universe!

It's just there, and it honestly haunts me.

11. I sometimes force myself to cry because it makes me feel better. It's my own stupid therapy technique.

12. I live in denial. Pretty simple.

14. I skipped number 13.

15. I make sure people know what I'm good at. I am definitely that person with too many interest/quirks/kinda-but-not-really-at-all talents. Oh, look I can read and write upside down! Did you know that I'm mildly ambidextrous? I actually call myself a baker, DiD yOu KnOw?

16. I would like to say: I am petty. That is all. (I would totally edit a Wikipedia article if it meant I could win an argument I'm wrong in.)

17. I once purposely misgendered someone because I was mad at them. 

Don't do that, kids. There is never a reason to disrespect someone that way.

Also, sorry to said person. You're probably reading this. Don't hate me? It was only one time??

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Aaand there we are! You can totally use these against me by the way :D

Have a great day/night, and make sure to stay sane. Or, like, drink water. Maybe get enough sleep. Don't fail school?