An Unlikely Duo 2: The Chamber of Secrets

One of Artemis' not-so-brilliant plans

Thinking was Artemis' job.

Artemis knew this, Nico knew this, literally everyone knew this. 

The other's could handle the dramatic battles and fast paced fights without a problem, but when things inevitably went wrong, that's when Artemis would have to make his move. 

Long story short: He was stuck doing damage control.

Usually, Artemis was more than happy to keep himself and his friends/acquaintances out of trouble, and if it involved winding people up, well, even better!

However, he wasn't usually asked to think of elaborate cover stories at 2AM, after being woken up by two kids falling on top of him.

The four boys and the girl were petrified as they listened to the approaching footsteps of Professor Snape.

"Well?" Artemis snapped suddenly, jolting them back into action, "What are you gaping at? Do something!"

Draco, Theodore and Blaise exchanged panicked looks.

"Do what?" Draco demanded, his eyes darting around frantically.

Artemis groaned and massaged his forehead, "Get under the bed." he told the girl, "Quickly, please!" he snapped, before falling out of bed himself, crashing to the ground with a huff.

Thankfully, the girl seemed to know that now was not the time to question his methods. A moment later, she had crawled under the nearest bed, which happened to be Nico's. 

"The rest of you-" Artemis paused briefly, realizing that Professor Snape's footsteps were far closer now, meaning that he was probably within earshot, "Uh, help me up please."

The confused boys complied, starting to fear for their friend's sanity as they tried to pull the boy to his feet, with the boy in question constantly falling over again as soon as they got him back to his feet, while muttering, "Hurry up already! How long does it take to walk down a few stairs?"

And that's how Snape found them a few seconds later, with Artemis seemingly muttering to himself while his friends helped him off the floor, and with Nico, who hadn't been seen for two days, snoring away on his bed.

"What is going on here?" Snape drawled, surveying the scene in front of him.

"Nothing to worry about, Professor." Artemis assured, finally deciding to stand up for good, "I just... fell out of bed, that's all."

"And where, Mr. Fowl," Snape asked, his voice betraying his exasperation, "did Mr. di Angelo come from? Didn't you tell me that he had to leave because of some 'urgent family business'?"

"I did."

"Then how is he here? If I'm not mistaken, you told me he would be staying with his father in America for a week!"

"Would you believe me if I said that I had no idea?"

Snape merely raised an eyebrow.

Artemis sighed, "Didn't think so."

Snape turned his attention to Nico, his exasperation turning to concern, "Is Mr. di Angelo alright?"

Artemis shrugged, "As much as it pains me to say this, I have no idea. My best guess is exhaustion."

Snape nodded slowly, as though barely understanding what was going on, "And... why were you on the floor, Mr. Fowl?"

"I fell off the bed when Nico crashed into it." 

"Crashed?"

"Sleep-walking, I presume."

"Well, Mr. di Angelo had better come with me to the hospital wing then." Snape said decisively, lifting Nico into the air with a wave of his wand, "Is anyone else in need of Madam Pompfrey's assistance?"

Artemis' stomach throbbed, but he shook his head nevertheless, watching as Snape strode briskly out of the room.

"We will talk about this more in the morning." Snape assured, his eyes narrowed as he cast one last look back at the seemingly innocent Slytherins.

Now that he was alert enough to actually think, he could tell that his injury would probably be fine in the morning. He had far better things to do than to waste his time getting a second opinion. After all, he was a more than accomplished doctor himself, thank you very much.

He would much rather use the next few hours to interrogate their.... guest.

Artemis turned to the girl, "You can come out now." he said.

The girl crawled out from underneath the bed, eyeing them all wearily.

"Where's Nico?" She asked, her voice surprisingly steady.

Artemis waved his hand casually,  "Relax, didn't you hear Professor Snape? He's in the hospital wing. Now, if you don't mind, we have a few questions-"

"Really? That was your brilliant plan?" Draco interrupted, looking incredibly annoyed, "Falling on the floor and making us pull you up a bajillion times? "

"Oh please," Artemis huffed, "As if you could do any better at 2AM."

A.N:

Hi folks!

I'm back from a nasty bought of writer's block. Truth be told, I think it's less writer's block, and more.... lack of drive.

I recently got into HTTYD, and boy am I obsessed. Every time I sit down to write, I get side-tracked by some HTTYD fanfic or the other. 

Y'all know how it goes.

Also, if you're wondering why Snape took so long, I don't know. Just pretend that it was like one of those slo-mo scenes in movies ore something. Or just imagine Snape walking really slowly. 

More realistically, the reason they heard footsteps so soon is probably because sounds echo in the dungeons or something? 

I dunno.

Anyway, sorry for the short chapter, but I promise that the next one will be longer!

I'd love to know what you think!

-Keera