After a troublesome and traumatic past, (Y/N) (L/N) joins the Armed Detective Agency as well as operating a part-time job at their family's nearby cafe. After dealing with everyone's shenanigans for countless months, (Y/N) seems to expect their life...
TW: Torture, Cursing, Suicide, Suggestive Dialogue SW: Teaching Them To Kill; Then To Die, The Beauty Is Quiet Like a Stone Statue (Kill A Man and Die Thee Too, Part 1 + Beauty, Hushed Like a Statue) RI: Atsushi Nakajima, Doppo Kunikida, Osamu Dazai, Ranpo Edogawa, Ryunosuke Akutagawa, Chuuya Nakahara
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Although Kunikida was speaking, his eyes didn't leave the computer as he calmly asked, "you can't track down Dazai?"
"He's not returning any of my calls and I can't find him at home either," Atsushi explained with a worried face. Though the way his hands were fidgeting it was obvious he was hiding something.
"He's probably floating down some river again," Kunikida sighed in exasperation, eyes not even taking a glance to the side and off of his paperwork. He had been working hard ever since he walked into the office since he just couldn't shake off the feeling that something was wrong. He couldn't place his finger on what it was yet, but everything felt off. But he knew it wasn't because Dazai.
"Maybe he got himself thrown in jail," Kenji suggested, staring at his plant with his usual smile. Kenji felt something was off too, but just ignored it as he believed that his optimism should persevere no matter how rough the day was going to be.
Ranpo was munching on some chips. While crunching down on them, his muffled voice spoke, "my guess is he's off with some person trying to convince them to commit double suicide with him."
Atsushi quickly noticed they weren't worried at all about him, so he decided to take a leap and reveal the other piece of news. "Well... (Y/N) is also gone. I talked to their sister, Ishiko, and she said that she hadn't seen them around either. They didn't even come home last night from a date with..." He gulped before continuing, "...from a date with Dazai."
It didn't take long for Kunikida to put the puzzle pieces into place. His finger stopped their rhythmic and calm tapping on the keyboard of the computer and he jumped up in frustration. "IF DAZAI DID SOMETHING TO THEM I SWEAR TO GOD-"
Kenji titled his head in confusion. "What do you mean by that? Maybe they're off together then?" That only made Kunikida more angry.
"I'D HANG HIM UP ON THE OFFICE WALL AND PRACTICE THROWING DARTS AT HIM! I'D WHACK AND PUNCH AND KICK AND-"
Ranpo titled his head downward as he sighed. "They'll be fine, Atsushi. You should relax Kunikida, they're not doing what you think they're doing. The clues just don't add up to that. (Y/N) can kick ass though, so you need not worry about them if they actually are in trouble." He continued munching on his chips calmly.
Kunikida didn't hear him. "HE'D WISH HIS SUICIDE ATTEMPTS SUCCEDED! I SWEAR I'D PLUCK HIS NAILS OFF AND FEED HIS SUICIDE MANUAL TO THE GOATS-"
"I can provide the goats!"
"You all are idiots! Think this through!"
"GET ME A TORTURE CHAMBER! I'VE LET HIM CONTINUE HIS ANTICS FOR FAR TOO LONG!"
