do you wanna touch me? | woosan

chapter 9

here's a song, as always: Finally // beautiful stranger - Halsey

wooyoung's pov

Wooyoung was devastated after San told him that he wants to break up. Lately he wasn't thinking of their relationship as a fake one and secretly he was hoping that San would tell him that he wants it to be real. He was so stupid for letting himself get attached to someone again even after he swore that he will never do that ever again. After he came back to his dorm room, he didn't speak to Yunho at all despite him asking a lot of questions. He felt as nothing was important anymore, he didn't have the motivation to study anymore or talk to anyone at this point. Ignoring Yunho's questions for two minutes straight, he just laid himself into his bed wanting to take a nap. Maybe that way he will be able to wake up in the morning thinking it was all a nightmare and San was still talking with him. 

But, it wasn't a nightmare. He met San a couple of times while he was walking around campus but he would just walk pass him, not even saying a simple 'hello'. Even though he was too depressed to study for his exams, Yunho was willing to help him which made Wooyoung happy knowing that his friend was there for him despite not knowing what happened. 

A week passed and in front of them was just one more week until they were done with their midterm exams. Wooyoung kind of found comfort in studying and that was the only distraction he had at that moment. He would study all day and all night, barely even sleeping and when he did sleep, his awful nightmares would come haunting him again. His friends were worried about him and knew that his recent moodiness was because of San, they noticed how they were ignoring each other. They didn't want to bother him unless he told them himself, but they were still trying to comfort him in other ways.

san's pov

"That exam was definitely one of the toughest!", Mingi said as him and San were exiting the exam hall.

"Yeah, I agree.", San told his friend and before he could say anything else, Wooyoung walked pass him.

He hasn't seen Wooyoung in days but he wasn't looking very well the last time he had seen him. And now, he was looking even worse. He had a tired look on his face, he looked like he didn't sleep for days. He also appeared kind of thinner even though he was wearing a big white hoodie and some baggy trousers trying to hide the fact that he did lose some weight. San was worried but he thought that he couldn't afford to think about Wooyoung right now because he had one more exam left. 

But that was something he could not control. The only thing that was on his mind was Wooyoung and he regretted what he did but it was too late now. He was hoping that Wooyoung would soon be back to his cheerful, loud self because he wanted him to be happy even if that meant never talking to him again. Wooyoung will get over it, right? After all they were in a fake relationship and it meant nothing. But that's when it hit him. To San, that fake relationship meant everything. The way Wooyoung made him feel meant everything to him.

While he was revising for his last exam in the school library, he saw Yunho running towards him.

"San, I need your help! Can you please bring these books over to Wooyoung, he really needs them for tomorrow's exam. Thank you!", before San could say anything, Yunho rushed somewhere else.

He had no choice but to go to Wooyoung's dorm room. He was planning on leaving the books in front of his door after knocking a couple of times but then he noticed that his dorm room was unlocked and it was very late already.

"He forgot to lock the door. Maybe I should warn him.", San said to himself.

After entering the dorm room, he saw Wooyoung sleeping, his head resting on his desk, surrounded by his books and a lot of empty coffee mugs. He quietly placed the books on his desk and was ready to leave until he felt Wooyoung grabbing his hand and squeezing it tightly.

"Please stop, you're hurting me.", Wooyoung was talking in his sleep. 

It looked like he was having a nightmare. San crouched in front of him, taking a better look at Wooyoung's face. He had the same frightened look on his face like the night they met Hyunjin. He was sweating and tears were rolling down his face. San softly shook his shoulders, trying to wake him up.

wooyoung's pov

Wooyoung raised his head from his desk, breathing heavily as he saw San crouching in front of him. He stood up from his chair letting go off San's hand he was previously holding, still having troubles breathing.

"Wooyoung, breathe.", San was trying to help him but Wooyoung hid his face with his hands telling him not to touch him.

"Okay, I won't touch you. But please breathe, Woo. You're safe, I'm here."

These words slightly comforted Wooyoung as he started sobbing in front of San. 

"It's okay, you're safe. Can I at least hold your hand?", San asked softly reaching out his hand.

Wooyoung took his hand and looked at San who had a worried look on his face. They were sitting on his bed for a while now, not saying anything while San was still keeping his distance, softly rubbing Wooyoung's hand with his fingers. 

"Are you feeling better now?", San asked after Wooyoung stopped crying.

"I am. I'm okay, you can go now.", Wooyoung said, knowing that San didn't come here on his own free will.

"I don't want to. I'm worried about you.", San answered, still holding his hand trying to comfort him.

"But why?", Wooyoung asked.

"Because I like you, Woo.", San answered making Wooyoung blush instantly.

"Right now, I want to hug you so bad. I really can't stand seeing you that sad and if it's even slightly because of me, I will never forgive myself.", San continued.

"No, of course it's not because of you! It's something else...", Wooyoung assured him.

"You don't have to talk about it if you're not ready. The point is, I really fucking like you Woo and I don't think I can live without you any longer. And it's okay if you don't feel the same...", San finally admitted his feelings and in that moment, Wooyoung let go of his hand and hugged him.

"I...like you too.", this time Wooyoung admitted his feelings as he felt a heavy burden fall of his shoulders. San hugged him even tighter and the two of them fell asleep in each other's arms that night. 

~ 

The bright sun touched Wooyoung's eyes as he woke up the next morning. He didn't want to get out of bed today but both him and San had to take their last exams that were luckily in the afternoon. He looked at the person sleeping peacefully next to him and took his time admiring his long eyelashes and dark messy hair. 

"Stop staring at me, idiot.", San murmured in his sleep feeling Wooyoung's gaze on him, still not opening his eyes.

"Idiot? Aren't we far behind that?", Wooyoung said, making San open his eyes very slowly.

"What do you want me to call you then, baby?", Wooyoung smiled after hearing the cringey pet name coming out of San's mouth.

"I'm not sure if I should cover my eyes or ears, what do you lovebirds think?", Yunho said entering the room after his morning run.

San and Wooyoung both stood up at the same time, looked at each other and simply started laughing at the situation they found themselves in.

"I know what you did, Jeong.", San said to Yunho who had a bright smile on his face.

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Another very soft chapter :3 I hope you liked it as much as I liked writing it, make sure to leave some nice comments! The next chapter should be published tomorrow, so look forward to it.

Love you guys~