misery

part 13

i was wondering what was that. i opened the door and looked around. it came form John's room. i carefully came to his door and I saw him kicking things. he didnt notice me.

"what are you doing?"

"ha what you think? everything is always my fault. EVEYRTHING."

"stop it. stop kicking. calm down."

"why should i calm down? yeah there is something i didnt tell you, Paulie. i have more hiding places and y'know what? im just gonna get high like i did. nothing really matters!" he shouted.

"what the hell are you talking about John?"
i said with broken voice.

"you see this is oxy's."he laughed. "and now im gonna drug myself." then he opened the pills and puts every pill into his mouth.

"what have you done John?" i watched him how he was laughing. "how many you took?"

"everything." he was laughing still more. then he sat on his bed and put his head into his hands. "im done Paul. i cant. i just cant." then he started crying. i was thinking what will i do. i was really mad but i felt sorry for him. i sat next to him.

"John im sorry for what i said. i was just full of rage. i-i-i was angry at my dad" i started crying "and i love you and you know that. maybe we should just forget about this. i know you have more hiding places. give me some."

he hugged me. his pupils were big. he showed me his spot. i took too every pill.

"we should go for walk Paul"

"i dont think its great idea."

"no its great idea c'mon! Paul?" i fall asleep

"oh my boy fall asleep."

then he hugged me and fall asleep too. we slept one whole day. we woke up at night next day.

"hey John i think we slept whole day."

"wha, really?"

"yeah look." i showed him clock.

"oh for god's sake."

"so what we will do now?"

"we should write some song."

"but its midnight."

"so?"

"okay ill go for my guitar."

i got up and went for my guitar. i took bass and classic guitar. i came to his room and he looked to me.

"so what about will be this song?"

i was thinking for a while then he shouted a little and i looked at him.

"maybe we can do something about that crazy fans like y'know what i mean? like 'help! i need somebody!' because we need it, dont we?"

"yes John thats brilliant." i was in shock. he was brilliant.

"so just say something about this, like how do you feel."

we was thinking and talking for an hours. in the morning we had a new song. we call it 'Help!'. we woke up lads and play them new song. they were in shock too.

"how did you make this? its brilliant!"

"oh it was Johns idea." i smiled

"yes but we made it together." he laughed

"actually i made song too." Geo said

"really? play it!"

"i call it 'i need you'."

then he begans to sing. it was brilliant too. but my dad was still worring me. i wanted to call him to make things clear.
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dialogue

"McCartney?"

i was silent but then spoke

"hello dad.."

"oh hello Paul.." he said sadly.

"im really sorry for what happend. i just-i love you dad. please dont be mad at me..."

"oh my son, im not mad or angry at you. im glad you call! can you come some day? Mike will be there, i promise.."

"i'll come, promise. see'ya dad!"

"goodbye Paulie!"
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epilogue

i hope, some day being homosexual wont be illegal. i hope some day we will get marry and get kids. i really love John. John, Johnny. i was married but i never felt like this. this must be true love. i remember our first concert or something like that, how much we were stressed. he always gave me his looks to calm me down and we were great! i really love to remember this nostalgic memories.

with love Paul.
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