What Makes You Beautiful? | h.s.

40: blurred

*Charli POV*

The past several weeks have all been a blur to me. There's been so much crap going on, that I don't know how to deal with it all.

Most of my time was spent crying in bed. I had no drive to do anything, and I refused to get out of bed for the first two weeks except to use the toilet or to shower.

Harry had somehow convinced Gram and Gramps to allow me some privacy, and he'd bring me food to the room every day. There were times where Harry was gone all day, and I only got to eat once the sun had gone down.

He'd go to work in the morning, and didn't come home until after dinner. I wouldn't make an attempt to go get myself food, and I eventually ended up having no energy.

The only decent thing that came from it was after about the second or third week of crying, my body seemed to have stopped producing any tears. I would be sobbing, but nothing came out.

I'm positive I had lost a significant amount of weight, because Harry would always bring sweets and ice cream for me to binge on, telling me to eat up and that I was scaring him.

Gram had dragged me grocery shopping many times against my own will. I didn't want to leave my bed, but every time she bugged me was when Harry was at work, so I had no valid reason to stay home. I'm almost positive that Harry had spoken to her at some point and convinced her to have me do something while he wasn't home.

A few other times Georgia has wanted to go for a drive and Niall had coincidentally been busy, so I went with her to keep her company. I never enjoyed it because it was always at the most random times, and I never had any energy. She always ended up talking to me, trying to pry information from me, but I felt like there was never anything worth talking about.

Harry had also kept up his band requirements. That was how I kept track of what day it was. Performances were Friday's and Saturday's, and by the time Monday came around, I had lost track of the date again.

Liam and Louis had asked about me, and I was told that they wanted to come visit, but Harry told them I wasn't really up for visitors.

I did feel really bad about the band thing though. He would go there slightly before they had to go on, and come home right after the performance. They had an occasional band meeting here and there, but were never very time consuming.

Harry had actually ended up bringing his guitar over - which I had no clue he had one - and had been writing while I was sleeping.

I'd wake up sometimes to hear him strumming and singing, and couldn't help but smile at how beautiful his voice sounded. I had convinced him to sing to me a few times when I was completely down, and my mood did a complete 180. I wish I had known before that he could sing. I'd have gotten him to sing to me more often.

There were also several times he begged me to accompany him on a few runs he went on. I denied for a while, but eventually decided I needed to get out of bed and do something useful.

Brooke had called and texted me many times to check up on me. I'd always answer because she doesn't deserve to be treated badly; but I never put any effort into holding a conversation with her.

She had apparently come over a few times, but I was sleeping each time. I felt bad that I haven't held up my end of the friendship, but she has to know that it's not her fault and I'm just trying to get over this.

My mind had still been reeling with the information I was handed by her. To be honest, I had never given Harry's actions a second thought; but now that there was a reason for it, everything had become more clear.