𝐩𝐚𝐩𝐞𝐫𝐜𝐮𝐭

viii. TALK TO ME.

CHARLES laid in Will's bed now, staring at the wall and hoping the tears that have been welling at his eyes don't fall. "Charles..." Will finally entered the bedroom, everyone else had finished eating so Will excused himself from the others to come check on him.

The tears slip past his eyes then and Charles just closed his eyes. "Charlie..." Will crawled into bed, getting right behind Charles and wrapping an arm around his waist. Even his waist had felt smaller than usual, making Will's face contort into worry and confusion. "Why are you doing this to yourself?" He whispers.

"Charlie..." He says, trying to get his boyfriend's attention and the Dumont finally opened his eyes. "Can... can you just keep holding me like this?" He whispered, pulling one of Will's arms up to his chest as he brings Will's hand to his face, pressing the back of it against his cheek. "Of course. Just please, talk to me." Will begged, pulling him in closer to him.

"I don't... like myself, Will." Charles said, more tears escaping past his eyes. "And I don't mean that in a way where I don't like the way I look, I think I'm quite handsome... but I don't like the way I think. Or talk. Or feel. Any of it. I just wanna get rid of myself sometimes. I constantly want to trade my life with someone else's." He whispered and Will frowned at that.

"And... I just don't think I'm worthy of love. Yours. Or our friends'. Or my mom's. I mean, the universe literally took away my mom. And my dad. That can't be an even more obvious sign I don't deserve love... especially yours. I feel like I don't deserve it. What did I do even do to have someone like you loving someone like me?" Charles mumbled, pressing his mouth against the back of his boyfriend's hand where he pressed small kisses.

"I can name many things, King Charleston." Will said before he climbed over Charles to lay in front of him instead of behind him. He raised his hands to cup Charles' cute little face, smiling faintly. "When I was gone, in the Upside Down... my mom said you'd never give up on trying to find me, even helping her out with the posters and everything... she also told me you were the only one who believed her when she said I wasn't dead." He says.

Charles glanced down, gulping softly at the memories of the past. "And... you were there by my side the whole time when I was possessed... you remember that, right? When we first kissed." Will is slowly leaning closer and Charles immediately glanced up. "Yeah." He smiled a bit, blushing hard as Will just smiled and brushed his thumb on Charles' cheek.

"And... you didn't give up on trying to get me to forgive you after the whole Snowball thing either. And you didn't hesitate to follow after me when I argued with Mike. And you did everything you could to protect me during the whole stuff at the mall..." He explains and Charles took a deep breath in, closing his eyes.

"Well, that's because I love you." He murmured and Will smiles. "And I love you. Because of how caring, and compassionate, and protective you are..." He says and Charles looks up. "I'm sorry." He says and Will shakes his head. "You have nothing to be sorry about. What you're going through is absolutely not your fault..." He says and Charles looked down, sobbing quietly. Will pulls him in closer and Charles just sobs into his chest, sniffling softly.

"I want to help you..." Will whispers, rubbing his back. "No." Charles refused but Will sighed. "I don't want to help you out of pity, I want to help you because I'm worried about you. I don't... I don't wanna lose you." Will said that in a shaky and shuddering voice that made Charles pull back slowly from his embrace.

He hadn't noticed that what he was doing to himself didn't only affect him, but Will too. "I love you too much, Charles. I can't bare the thought of going through something like that." Will says with teary eyes staring into Charles'. "I love you so much, Will. I would never hurt you like that. The thought of hurting you like that..." He whispers, his hands now cupping Will's face as his boyfriend's hands are on his back.

"I'm sorry. I'll try my best to do better." Charles whispers and Will just rubs his back, shaking his head. "Go at your own pace... can we go grab something to eat right now?" He asked, slowly getting up by propping his arm up and Charles just shook his head. "I--I don't want to... is that okay?" He whispers and Will sighs, laying back down. "Tomorrow. You can start tomorrow, okay?" He softly caressed Charles' back again and the boy just nods.

"It's not gonna be easy... but I'll be with you every step of the way, alright?" Will whispers, smiling faintly and Charles glanced up at him, nodding softly. "I love you." He whispers and Will just smiles more. "I love you..." He leaned in, pressing his lips to Charles'.

Their kiss deepens as Will's arms go around his boyfriend's waist and Charles' arms go around his neck. Charles laid back down as Will sort of hovered over him, still holding him close and then there was a knock on the door so they basically jumped apart and the door slightly opened as they both sat up.

"Charles?" It's Mike. Of course. Who else would ruin the alone time that Charles finally gets to have with his boyfriend? "What is it, Wheeler?" Charles sighed and Mike just stood there awkwardly in the doorway, glancing between his two friends. "Could you... talk to El? See if she's okay? I would... but I don't think I'm someone she wants to see right now." He said and Charles squinted his eyes at him.

"I wonder why that would be..." He says and Mike sighs. "Could you just talk to her? Tell her I'm sorry or something? You guys have a special bond, I mean, your parents, you know, like, they..." Mike stopped and Charles nods. "Died?" He says, crossing his arms and Will put his hand to Charles' lower back as a sign of comfort. "Some...something like that." Mike just mumbled quietly, glancing at Will.

"Fine. But I'm doing it for El. Not you." He says, sounding annoyed before he leaned over, pecking Will softly on the lips then got up, sighing before brushing past Mike at the door who just looked at Will, then quickly followed after to watch Charles head upstairs.

Charles walked towards El's room with clammy hands and his heart hammering against his chest. He sighed and took a deep breath before raising his hand right when the door opened and El stood there with glossy red eyes and puffy cheeks. "Hey..." He says, quickly putting his hand down and she just sighed.

"Hi."

authors note finally some formerly step-siblings but not even step-siblings at all bonding between el and charles. (also i kind of love jopper more than the idea i had planned for hopper and sarah so i'm thinking of it being like "oh we were just besties, platonic. with a capital P!" just like robin and steve so they might just be "besties" w/ jopper endgame) plus el is still a sister since he's with will, sister in law 😎