let me go || l.h.

n i n e t e e n

by around 4 o'clock, we had a song. luke and i were so proud of our creation. he grabbed my hand and led me to the music room next door. it was filled with guitars- acoustic, electric and bass- and even had a drum kit in the middle. luke smiled at me as my eyes took it all in. "this is where the magic happens," he said.

luke sat down on a stool and grabbed an acoustic guitar. he put his song book on a stand in front of him and began to tune the guitar. i watched, amazed, as his fingers worked at the strings with assurance. he cleared his throat, and his striking voice began to fill the room.

"tonight we're fading fast. i just wanna make this last. if i could say the things that i want to say, i'd find a way to make you stay. i'd never let you get away. catch you in all the games we've played.

so go ahead, rip my heart out. show me what love's all about. go ahead, rip my heart out. that's what loves all about.

i want you to want me this way. and i need you to need me to stay. if you say that you don't feel a thing- if you don't know, let me go, let me go, let me go, let me go. if you don't know, then just let me go.

let's forget the past. i swear we'll make this last. 'cause i remember the taste of your skin tonight, and the way you looked, you had those eyes. i remember the way it felt inside, and the name of the songs that made you cry. you would scream, we would fight, you would call me crazy. i would laugh, you were mad but you'd always kiss me. and the shirt that i had that you always borrowed, when i woke, it was gone. there was no tomorrow.

i want you to want me this way. and i need you to need me to stay. if you say that you don't feel a thing- if you don't know, let me go, let me go, let me go, let me go. if you don't know, then just let me go.

go ahead, rip my heart out. if you think that's what loves all about. go ahead, rip my heart out. go ahead, rip my heart out. go ahead, rip my heart out. if you think that's what loves all about. go ahead, rip my heart out. go ahead, rip my heart out.

i want you to want me this way. and i need you to need me to stay. if you say that you don't feel a thing- if you don't know, let me go, let me go, let me go, let me go. if you don't know, then just let me go."

by the time the song finished, i had tears in my eyes. i hadn't even noticed. luke was just so beautiful. and the song, his voice just fit it perfectly. he saw me crying, and wrapped his arms around me, sitting me on his lap. "what's wrong, gorgeous?" he asked me. i sighed, "i just- i love you so much. i love you so fucking much and i don't want you to leave." fresh tears spilled over my eyelids and fell onto my lap.

luke sighed, "i don't want to leave either, tiahn. but we both know that i have to. this is a huge chance for us." i nodded my head, unable to speak. luke grabbed my chin in his fingers and pulled up my head so that i could look him in the eyes. those eyes. i lost myself in them every single time. luke looked serious. "i won't forget about you, okay?" he said, "i could never forget about you. ever. i love you too much." i nodded again, burying my head in his chest.

luke kissed the top of my head and held me. we sat there, our bodies entwined, for what seemed like forever. gently, luke removed me from his lap and headed into his room. he came back with a pack of pencils and a book. luke flipped to the front page of the book and placed it and the pencils before me. "i'm gonna just finish up this song, fine tune it a bit, you go crazy," he said, smiling at me.

i picked up a pencil and began to draw, the sounds of luke's guitar lulling me into focus. the pencil began moving, with my consent or without it, i didn't know. i sketched a strong jaw line, broad shoulders and defined collar bones. i had begun to sketch luke. i filled in details about him- his lip ring, the hint of stubble on his chin. those piercing blue eyes. the gorgeous blonde hair.

i felt someone standing behind me, and turned to see luke staring at the drawing in astonishment. "wow," he said, holding it up. "it's me," he said. i felt myself blush. "well, yeah," i mumbled. luke shook his head and put the book back down in front of me. i quickly signed and dated my drawing, and then looked up to see luke's eyes on mine. he reached out and cupped my face in his strong hands, rubbing his thumb along my cheek, then across my bottom lip.