AniDita : Spaces Between Us

sometimes its too late

It was 5pm strom finally stopped. Sun was hiding behind the clouds. Bondita's sleep broke and realised she slept putting Her head on his shoulder and also under same blanket. He was also sleeping. She felt very shy. She carefully made him lie on sofa and warpped the blanket fully around his body.

She went to her room and sat on the floor folding her knees.

Bondita : muihe pata nehi mere vabissiya mein kiya likha hain. kiske sath likha hain? agar shakhababu aur mein kabhi ek nehi hosakte to unhe wapas kiyu layein zindegi mein? mujhe nehi pata piyar crush kiya hota hain par itna jaanti hu maine bachpaan se shirf unke hi sapne dekhe hain. mera unke bare mein sochna...mithi yaadein bana na kiya galat tha? woh mere patibabu thei main agar unko leke sapne nehi dekhungi to kisko leke dekhti? itna sabkuch hone ki badh bhi meri dil mein unki jagah aaj bhi wohi hain. kiyu main chah ke bhi unse nafrat nehi kar paati?

Bondita was crying suddenly she felt a hand on her head. She turned and saw Anirudh patting her head.

Anirudh : kiya hua?rou kiyu rahi ho aise?

Bondita immidately wipped her tears.

Bondita : aap uth kiyu gayein?

Anirudh : agar meri bondita aise zor se royegi to main kaise chain se sou sakta hu?

Anirudh said with a decent smile while patting her head. Bondita looked at him for sometime while tears fall from her eyes. Bondita removed his hand with a jerk and shout at him.

Bondita : nehi hu mein apki Bondita! nehi hu! main shirf apni maa ki Bondita hu aur kisi ki nehi.

Anirudh : ghussa araha mujhpe? ghussa ana lazmi hain. to chahe maar lo mujhe daant lo main kuch nehi kahunga bas maaf kardo mujhe. mujhe pachtawa hain apni galti ka. I am sorry.

Anirudh told clamly with moist eyes.

Bondita : aap pachtawa hoke kiya faidah? bohat der hochuki hain. sabkuch badal chuka hain sab kuch. apko main sabkuch maanti thi par aab bhi dusro ki tarha jhootei nikle apne wadeh todh diye. mujhe apne zindegi ke aise modh pe lake khara diya jaha se mujhe pata nehi konsa rasta sahi hain konsa galat dono hi sahi lagte hain fir dono hi galat.

Anirudh : par hua kiya hain? aisa kiyu keh rahi ho? agar mujhe puri baat nehi batayogi to main tumhari madat kaise karunga?batao kiya hua? tum nehi jaanti tum mere liye kiya ho.

Bondita : nehi batana mujhe apko bas yehi jaan lijiye aap mujhse jitna door rahe utna hi accha hoga.itne saal se akele khudhko samhala hain age bhi samhal lungi. meri zindegi mein dhakhal maat dijiye. jab jab apko dekhti hu na tab tab yaad ata hain ke mere toote huye bharose ka. meri bikhri huyi zindegi ka. mujhe bas taqleef hi hoti hain or kuch nehi. kash mujhe apka chahra bhi dekhna padeh. tab sare jhakam taza hojata hain aur bhul jaiye ke humdono ke bich kabhi koi rista tha ya dubara woh rista judh payega. aap mere teacher hain aur main apki student. Usse ziyada kuch nehi aur yeh jhoot dubara maat kahiye ga ke mein aapke liye zaruri hu.

Bondita shout at him while crying. Anirudh didn't replied and left from there. He admits that he did wrong with her but was it so easy for her to ask him to forget everything? how could she say that she means nothing for him? He considered her his life his sansar, his breath,his shadow his everything. He didn't move on even knowing she is married. She didn't knew how much its hurting him to behave like a stranger when she was person who matters the most in his life. almost from 1 year he was seeking her forgiveness. didn't she ever saw his pain his guiltiness in his eyes. how could she? she only believed what she thinks.

Bondita went to college. One by one class started. It was Anirudh's class. but he didn’t came. Bondita got tensed. But she let that go. Next day Anirudh again missed. Bondita got tensed thinking if he alright. that moment helly came sadly.