Reena Desai: Kill Lady

Chapter 5

Ever since Rocky had come into my life, my nights were sleepless. Feeling the cool, soothing night breeze against me, I replayed the scenes from earlier.

The feeling of his heavy masculine aura around me.

My suffering when I thought about his struggles as a little boy.

My burning jealousy when I saw him dancing with Milky.

Him not touching me, even when he could've claimed me as his. He had shown me what a fool I was, to objectify myself.

And his intense, black eyes, that made me feel like the two of us were alone, even in a completely crowded room. Eyes that could mean danger for anyone standing in his path but extremely soft, when they met mine.

He hadn't just pursued me, he made me arrive at my biggest epiphany.

One that I was too scared to admit. One that I struggled to accept. That too in such a short time.

I was in love with Rocky.

The moment I accepted it, happiness that I had denied myself for too long surged through my heart. I looked at the lightening sky. I needed to tell Rocky. I was his and his only, just like he was mine and mine only.

He had a gargantuan task coming up - the assassination of Garuda. Something was amiss, but I couldn't figure it out. I was angry at my father's greed. I had heard about Garuda, fairly a few times, when my father thought I wasn't around. He must be obviously terrifying. I had never seen my father tremble with fear. Until, I had heard the name 'Garuda'. I was worried about shifting Rocky's focus, which would be potentially fatal. After another vicious conflict between my heart and brain, I decided to postpone my confession to the day of his success. I was confident, he would be successful. From what I had seen, this was a man who barrelled towards challenges and faced them head-on.

For the first time in over a decade, I stepped into the Pooja room. I joined my palms together, closed my eyes tightly and prayed for Rocky's success and wellbeing.

***************

My father was in a great hurry, as he quickly finished his breakfast.

"Reena, Kamal and I will be very busy today. We're going to the DYSS party office for the announcement of the next chief minister. Lots of work to be done. I want you to stay home today", he said edgily.

I pretended not to know the reason for his wariness. He was worried that if things went south, Garuda could end up killing me as his punishment.

But they wouldn't go south. Because, if he arrived to kill me, Rocky was...

I forced myself not to think that word. He would be successful. I was confident in him.

I assured my dad I would stay home and bade him goodbye.

I tried to while away the day, by reading books. But to no avail. I was extremely restless. The lack of sleep and proper meals were also taking their toll on me. But damned if I could just close my eyes. I needed to know Rocky was fine.

Frustrated, I went to the shooting range in the lawn. Rifles always helped me focus and was a perfect vent for my frustration. I floundered a bit, when I let my emotions leak. But I got better and better, when I controlled them. When we let emotions control us, we lacked clarity. And with a clearer head, I turned on the news.

***************

The chief minister's name was announced. It was my father's other associate - Gurupandian. I waited with bated breath. There was no other news. If someone was shot at the party office, it would've been the largest news of the day. There was not even a whisper of anything amiss.