Unknown to you

Chapter twelve

"What the hell are you doing?"  Jonathan asks him in a trembling voice.  My heart starts pounding faster as I see my mom trying to escape his grasp...again.

"Here's the deal.  You all, are going to pack your shit, and move back to the city with me.  You're not going to tell anyone.  You're not going to contact anyone.  We're leaving tomorrow morning.  Pack whatever you want.  And if you do anything out of line...I'll blow bullets into your moms brain.  You got that you little shits?"  Dad says in a cold, mensing voice that sent chills down my spine.  Jonathan looks at me then back to mom, then back to dad.

"I SAID DO YOU UNDERSTAND?!"  Dad screams.

"Yes."  Jonathan says coldly, fighting back tears.

"What about you huh?"  Dad gestures towards me.  I nod violently.

"Good.  Now go to your rooms, pack, and don't say anything to anyone."  Dad says in a demanding voice.  Jonathan and I walk past him and I run to my room.  I shut my door and let my tears fall from my eyes.  I started hyperventilating. 

This can't be happening.  I'm in a dream.  Dads in the city and not here.  It's fine, I'm fine, everything's fine.  I kept trying to tell myself but I knew it wasn't true. 

I look at my broken walkie on the floor.  Dad must have destroyed it.  I start crying more. 

I didn't know what to do.  I went to my desk and ripped out a blank piece of paper from my sketchbook. 

-

Dear Mike,

If you're reading this then that means I'm back in the city and most likely won't be coming back anytime soon.

I'll try my best to come back when I turn 18 but I'm not promising anything.  I don't know if I'll even be alive.  Don't wait for me, move on, talk to new people.  Don't let me hold you back from finding someone else.

But anyway...

I really just want to say thank you.  Thank you for these past couple of months, thank you for showing me what love feels like, thank you for giving me a best friend.  Thank you for everything.  You really have no idea how much you matter to me.  I love you more than anyone.  That's crazy isn't it? 

I'll always wear you're promise ring.  I'll always think about you.  I'll always miss you.  But like I said, don't let me hold you back.  Don't waste your high school years for someone that might be dead. 

That's all.  I love you Mike.

Love,
Will.

-

I sob as I fold the letter in half.  Then again, then again.  I write Mikes name on it and set it down on my bed.  I look around my room.  It was now destroyed.  There were four boxes on my bed, I assume that's the only amount I can bring with me back to the city.  I cry harder if that was even possible. 

I decided I would sneak out tonight and bring the letter over to Mikes house.  I would leave it on the doorstep really quick. 

The thought of leaving Mike scared me more than anything else.  He's become a part of me.  I don't know how to live without him. 

And then I had to think about the fact that I was going back to the city.  With all the bullying, abuse, and trauma.  It would be just like before we moved here.  I didn't want that.  I loved my life here.  I didn't want to leave.  I cry even harder. 

I pick up the broken walkie-talkie and put it on my desk.  I was going to try to fix it but I can't.  It's smashed into little pieces.  I wipe my face with my sleeve and sigh.