PASSING SHADOWS|| BOOK II

IV

•"I used to float, now I just fall down.
I used to know but I'm not sure now.
What I was made for?"•

Mauhúr holds Alguth's arm with the whip inside, snarling, his sharp nails digging in. The whip is wrenched out of Alguth's arm, and he hurls the whip downward onto his head.

Alguth drops down in agony, a cut in his face spurting blood. Dregbad (the ignorant one) and another move towards him.

"Aagh!" He cries, and his two orc cronies run to him.
"Leave him!" Mauhúr commanded, and they halted in their sharp tracts. "He's a fool."
Mauhúr moves to stand by Alguth's head
"Did you not pay heed to what the Wizard said? He wanted the fleshings back, unharmed!" He growled,"unscathed." He landed a kick in Alguth's ribcage, retribution and punishment for what was done to me only moments ago "Should the white Wizard find out about this, you and you alone will face his wrath."

Mauhúr sulked away from the company, and my head fell towards the floor, suddenly weighing even more as I cried, tears full of relief. I couldn't trust Mauhúr, but at least I knew he wouldn't allow anything physically violent to happen to me. At least, not yet.

Alguth was dragged away, but not without a glance in my direction. Full of anger and hatred. Brimming with vengeance. As I cried as softly as I could, I felt Pippin move toward me and place his head on my shoulder. Eventually, I fell asleep.

When I came to it was late, so late it was almost dawn. I figured the trauma had induced a deep sleep one such that I would forget what had happened. But I doubted I would. In fact, I knew I wouldn't.

The birds were singing, but I couldn't see where. They were hiding, hiding from death at the hands of the Uruks. They had sensed what they were. Knew what they were. I wondered if Legolas knew what I was.

Who I truly was. Someone who loved him, dearly, earnestly. And someone that was broken. The sun had sheathed across the sky, gold, orange, pink, and indigo decorating the sky.

Blue as deep as Legolas' eyes. It wasn't the last time I thought about him that morning. I thought about him as my bounds were undone, and I was dragged towards the cart to begin another day of merciless and relent punishment. I thought about him when the door was shoved in on me again, and the world darkened. And I whispered to him when the cart was dragged along the road, hoping the wind would carry my voice to him. Carry my love to him. Carry my tears and my pain and my longing.

Pippin and Merry hadn't understood why I was so determined to leave this place. Why I didn't want to wait, bide my time. But I couldn't. Because I wanted to prove to myself that I could make a difference. That I was here for good. But so far, I had failed miserably at that. I hadn't saved Boromir or kept him from the seduction of the Ring. And I couldn't save Merry and Pippin either. I thought I was supposed to be making a difference here. I thought I was meant to save people and help people. That I was here for a purpose. But maybe I was just here because of a mistake.