Weirdo (Ruikasa)

Part 4

Angsty Chapter

Today I'm supposed to meet Touya. He is my friend since we were little kids. Many people think that I'm too loud and weird but not him. He always enjoyed my stories and my perfomances. And that makes me really happy.

We met on main street near Rainbow Cream Cafe. "HELLO TOUYA." I screamed very loud and people looked at me like i was psycho or smth. "Hello Tsukasa-kun." he answered very calm. "Haven't seen you in a while Touya." "Yeah, is that because of your performances Tsukasa?". I loved when someone asked about performances, I could talkt about them for hours!!!

"HAHAHA well if you want to know then yes." I was talking about this  for next 30 minutes but Touya seemed to enjoy my talk. "And then-" I stopped. Someone walked past me and I felt warm feeling gling through my body. I looked and i saw him. I saw Rui. Whenever i see him i feel butterlflyes in my body and my face going red. I hate that feeling I feel like I can't do anything.

...Something was off. Rui was with someone, with some girl. I looked closer and i knew her very good. It was Nene. What was she doing there?

They were laughting and having good time, but I didin't like that. Was I jealous?? No.... why would I be jealous? I don't like Rui like that. They weren't on date...right? ....right.

Fuck. They were on date.

They looked just too happy... they were couple. Ha ha. What was I expecting.

I could hear my heart crashing into piecies. My body was really heavy  for some reason. Everything was blury and I could feel my eyes filling with tears.

Shit. I can't cry, not in public. Not near Touya.

"Tsukasa-kun?" Touya called my name. "Are you okay Tsukasa...". I turned my head down so Touya couldn't see my face, my tears. "Yeah we should go home" I could hear my voice cracking in the middle of sentence.  "Sure"

When we went far from Main street I couldn't hold it anymore. I started crying. "Fuck, fuck, fuck." Even when i wiped my tears they were only new one coming out.
Touya looked at me really worried. "Tsukasa what happend?" Touya hugged me. I cried in his shoulder. I wanted to die

Why did I even cry?? Did I really like Rui? Was i really Gay?

I just felt worse and worse. Why me? Can't I be normal. Fuck. Why always me ,am I cursed? I'm a world future star i am not supposed to be gay, right?  No one will ever accept me and Rui is straight he will never like me back.

"Tsukasa-kun what happend??" "I'm sorry touya I..." I didn't want to vent to Touya. He has his own problems and my are not importand. "It's nothing" "Tsukasa-kun there is no point in lying... you can talk to me you know?"

I knew that. He was my friend he would accept me. "I..."  I couldn't say anything. My throat was really dry at moment. So dry that I couldn't say a word.

Touya bringed me back home. The first thing I have done was lying on my bed and start crying, again.

Warm tears were going on my chicks. Why did love hurt so much? Wasn't that supposed to be beautifull thing? For now it is my worst nightmere

Bit angsty chapter I hope you guys enjoy it it far!!