"Micael, you saved me. You saved my life. But I don't love you. I'm sorry.."
I woke up. It was 3am and I decided to go outside for a walk, it was fresh outside I had a dream with Isabelle again. Isabelle, my first girlfriend had left me for some jock when my father died. She said she couldn't be with someone who was "emotionally unstable." I thought I loved her, i thought she had been the one. I was wrong, and now that i had found Carolyn I realized that i wasn't really in love with Isabelle, It was just an illusion in my head. I got into my car and drove to Carolyn's house, I saw the lights still on so I figured that she was still awake. I knocked on her door and there was no answer, i peeked in the window and i saw a puddle of blood by the kitchen floor, I noticed drops of blood also along the hall way. Was Carolyn okay? I called her and i got sent straight to voice mail. I saw that Carolyn hid a key inside a little statue of an angel so I looked to see if it was there and it was, i opened the door and walked towards the puddle. There was a large knife next to it.
"Hello...Carolyn" i said as i made my way into the hallway. i opened her bed room door and turned on the light, her IPod was playing Pantera-Cemetery Gates, I knew the song because i listened to the same bands she did.
Left in my misery. The reverend he turned to me
Without a tear in his eyes
It's nothing new for him to see
I didn't ask him why
I will remember
The love our souls had sworn to make
Now I watch the falling rain
All my mind can see
Now is your...
The music kept playing as I looked around her room, the blood trail had stopped at her bathroom, where i heard the shower on. I looked around and saw pictures of Carolyn and her mother. I saw books and posters of bands, I saw her computer, which indicated she had used it no more than 20 minutes ago. There was a bloody towel next to it and a suite case full of Carolyn's clothes. Her computer was logged on to her blog. I read it and it brought me to tears.
"I can no longer live with out my mom, Ive attempted suicide tonight but Ive failed. I know no one cares about me. I know i have no one left, no one can see that these smiles are fake, or that i really need someone to just hug me, I really miss my mother and i cant live in this world without her. She was my guardian, my angel. Ive decided to leave school & Ill be deleting this blog in the morning, I'm sorry you guys, but i think I'm just gonna pack my things and leave this town. Goodbye."
I stepped into the bathroom and saw Carolyn in the tub.She was fully dressed and weeping. Her arm was bleeding and the water was red. She looked at me and weeped even harder. I grabbed her and stepped in the water next to her it was freezing cold, she tried to pull away but I held her, I didn't leg her go. I rocked her but she wouldn't calm down. The gash in her arm looked pretty bad and I started to wounded if she would eventually bleed out.
"Micael, leave please. I want... I need to be alone."
"No. I'm staying right here, with you."
"Please." I could here her sorrow as she began to cry uncontrollably.
"No. Stop asking because I won't."I sat in the tub and held her, she kept trying to fight for me to release her, but she was too weak.
"Then make it stop. Make the pain stop. Please make it go away, it hurts and I cant. This is too much pain. Everyone I love is gone!"
