Sacrifice

Perspective

All around me is blackness. I can't move at all and trying to open my eyes feels like the biggest job in the world right now. I think I'm back on the Sunny? I want everyone to know that I'm okay. I think? Hearing everyone come in and talk to me made me feel okay. Sanjis' is the one that surprised me the most. There's no way that shitty-cook cared that much. We fought all the time, argued with eachother, avoided each other the list goes on and on. Why was he acting this way? It makes me feel weird and what's making it worse is the fact that I don't mind how its making feel. I understand what he means though. I like our fights too. We use them to challenge ourselves. To make us stronger. He through me off with the dream speech though. I never thought he cared that much. Do I regret what I did? No, not at all. It was either me or Luffy. I know Sanji is hurt but, I couldn't leave our crew without a captain. He is worrying me though. He acted so cold toward Robin and was woke up by Chopper yelling at him. I figure he was having a nightmare by the way his breathing was and the ehimpers coming from him. I like when he was holding my hand too. It gave me some peace and helped me ignore all the pain I was in.
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WAIT A MINUTE

Could he? No. There's no way. He can't stand me being in the same room as me let alone be close to me like that.

Not being able to move really sucks when the way I'm laying is the most uncomfortable thing ever. I begin hearing movement next me again so I focus on listening. Upon listening to the movements around me, I hear what sounds like 2 voices. One high pitch and the other super serious. Wait...Luffy and Chopper? I keep hearing sniffling coming from both of them but no one will tell me what's going on.

"Luffy. I'm sorry. There's nothing more that I can do at this point. We'll give him 3 more days of medication and if that doesn't work, we-we're letting him go." I can hear the tears in Chopper's voice as he tries speaking. Am I really that injured? I mean yeah it makes sense. Anyone would be dead trying to take all the pain of someone and put it on yourself. Breaking out of my thoughts I hear Luffy say, "A-Are you s-sure Chopper? We c-can't do anymore?" Hearing Luffy sound so heartbroken added to the pain in my chest. I assume Chopper nodded his head because all I hear next to me is thud and muffled cries from Luffy. Please don't cry captain. I did this for you. If I don't make it it's my fault not yours. I hear them bring up telling the rest of the crew and agree to do it as soon as possible. I hear the door open and close and Luffy call everyone for a meeting. Well.....NOW I'M BORED ALL OVER AGAIN JUST WITH MORE SCARY INFORMATION. The fuck am I supposed to do now? UGGGHHHHH Being almost dead sucks. Instead of laying here with a regular heartbeat now I'm laying here with a regular heartbeat and a lot of unanswered questions.

CRASH!!

I- THE FUCK WAS THAT??

BOOM!!

I know DAMN well they aren't having a party without me. Come on YOU'RE LYING. Well aint that some bullsh-

Was that someone screaming? And Luffy was yelling? It is muffled but I can know Luffy's voice from miles away. Who is he fighting with and why are they screaming like that? It sounded familiar. Lemme think. Luffy? No he's more of a sob when he cries loud. Chopper? Eh no. He cries higher pitch. I know Nami and Roin are upset but I don't think they would cry like that. This one was gut wrenching it made my chest flare up in pain. Usopp cries a lot so I know that wasn't his. Franky is emotional but not that bad and Brook barely even knows me. That leaves onl- oh no. S-Sanji? Did Chopper break the news to him? If so, why does he sound so distraught about it. I hate how it sounds. He sounds like someone just ripped his heart out.

Internally sighing I hear all the noises stop. Hoping that the ruckus dies down I try to get a little rest before people start coming in and out again. I hope the cook comes back in at some point. He hasn't been in here in a few days. I miss his voice. His eyes. His cooking. Mmmmmmm his food is to die for. The mix of spices and beautiful craftmanship he has when he is in the kitchen. While thinking about the Ero-Cook, I slowly drift into a light nap.

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Hearing movement from outside the infirmary doors made me regain concisouness. I hear sniffling coming the person and weight towards the middle/end of the bed. It feels like someone is trying to get comfortable. Once they finish, I feel a familiar hand on top of mine. He has been crying again. I know that was him screaming earlier and it broke my heart hearing him like that. Why is he sitting away from me instead of on the chair facing me like usual? After a few moments of hearing labored breathing, he finally starts to talk.

I-Is he confessing? Everything he is saying. He truly feels this way?

"Please wake up. I haven't even told you that I loved you yet..." I hear him brokenly admit. There's no way....H-He loves me? How? When? All these question are running though my head all the while Sanji is talking.

"Z-Zoro. I love you. I-I have lost many things throughout my life. I was alone before. I'm n-not now. I-I'm strong and can handle myself even when fighting you. Y-You're all I ever wanted. Y-Y-You're all I ever need. Pl-Please...... You c-cannot leave me h-here." This hurts. More than any injury I can have. Hearing the cries from someone you watched grow so strong is heartbreaking. Knowing that he thinks they're falling on deaf ears hurts ever more. I hear you. What do you mean You were alone before? What did you lose before we got you cook? What are you hiding from us? From me? We don't know your story but I want to. If it is making you like this then it obviously wasn't good. I'll be okay. I will pull through. I never knew you had panic attacks but I can hear you starting to have one. Please stop crying over me. You're breaking my heart.

As Sanji is repeating over and over "Please don't leave" and other cries, I feel myself becoming emotional. Knowing that no one is in here to help him while I hear him struggle to breath almost on the verge of a panic attack. Can someone please come and help him?! GOD DAMMIT BODY MOVE. I want to hug him. Hold him until he calms down. I know how it feels to lose control of your body. You should never have to deal with that cook. I can feel the tears rolling down the left side of my face. Trying to ignore the emotions I feel. I try to use all my strength to squeeze the cooks hand. After a few seconds of trying, I was able to squeeze his hand just a little but enough for him to feel it.

I hear him gasp and call my name.

"Pl-Please. If you can hear me...Try to squeeze it again." He shakingly spoke out.

Shit. This is a lot of work at the moment. Okay lets do this again.

Using all of my might, I squeeze a little tighter this time. To show him I'm here and I'm not planning on going anywhere.

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Okay this is so much better. I get so picky about how I write and I like being perfect. I also like longer chapter because then it's less ads! Anyways hope you enjoyed and I will be updating both books tomorrow! <3