Psychotic Love - Billy Hargrove FF (+21)

Chapter 14

BILLY'S POV
Why does every good situation have to turn into shit?! Y/N is making me go fucking insane.
She always has to nag about the past..doesn't she?
Did I beat her ass before?
Yes.
Do I regret it?
I guess, I don't know ok.. it's partly her fault, but ofc...it hurts me to see her in so much pain. I'm not stupid, I know I'm the reason for her tears, but there is just no other way to make her listen. I want to protect her ..but how can I do that without doing shit that makes her sad? Maybe she'd be happier if I'd show her that I do trust her..a new opportunity to make her feel a little more independent again..

Y/N's POV
While driving back home no one spoke a word to each other. Billy parked his Camero outside his house and we both got inside.
"Are you hungry?",
Billy asked, putting his jacket off, and letting himself fall backwards onto the couch in the living room.
I stood by the glass door that was leading into our garden and shrugged my shoulders.
Billy took a deep breath and I could hear him walking over to me. Two big arms sneaked their way around my waist, and I could feel his head resting on my shoulder. I got goosebumps all over my body.
"I'm sorry."
Billy's hoarse voice beamed against my eardrums.
I scrunched my eyebrows together.
"What?",
I asked skeptical.
"I know I fucked up before ok. I know I did. You your constantly stuck in the past. Let's live in the moment and don't Dwell on the past."
I scoffed at his comment. What exactly about he past? The part where you punched me a bloody nose or the part where you beat me up with your belt? But of course I only kept those thoughts to myself and stayed silent.
"Can't you at least try to see the good sides about this? I'm really trying to make it work for us. You got a nice house, don't have to pay for anything, live in California right by the beach,-"
He got even closer to my ear.
"-and a hot ass man by your side who looks             
after you",
he whispered and made my smile in annoyance.
"God, you are just so cheesy!",
I said turning around, laughing and playfully pushing him off of me. He started laughing as well and dramatically fake fell onto the ground.
"Holy shit lady ..and people call me aggressive..",
he muttered under his breath, holding his shoulder and pretended to be in pain.
"You suck Hargrove."
I said smiling and put his hand out for him to pull himself up. He took it but rather than standing, up he used the opportunity to grab my hand and pull on it with force, making me fall on top of him.
"You asshole, this one time I offer you my help and you still mess around!"
I shouted, pretending to be angry at him and wanted to stand up.
"Wait sunshine I'm sorry okay, I just wanted you near me",
he said holding my waist and placing it over his pelvis.
"How about ...and you listen carefully now. How about I'd allow you to find a job h-"
"OMG ARE YOU SERIOUS ?!",
I cut him off by jumping in the air, and without realizing, pushing my entire weight really hard onto his crotch, making him yelp in pain.
"Fuuu-, god damn you pice of shit! Fuck!",
Billy screamed out, pushing me away from him and right after falling onto his side, holding his balls.
"Oh shit I'm so terribly sorry ..",
I said and helplessly watched him squint his eyes in pain. I rushed into the kitchen, opened the fridge and found some ice packs and made my way back over to him. Standing in front of Billy I was about to press the ice pack onto his dick, already moving my hand dangerously close to his area, when I stopped dead in my tracks, and shook my head to myself.
"H-Here you go. I'm sorry"
I said genuinely, crouching down to his level.
"Don't worry about it, you weren't planning on expending our little family so soon anyways, right?"
He said with closed eyes while leaning against the living room wall. I chuckled a little at his comment.
"Nope not really, but I hope you feel better soon still."
I was petting his hair and pushed the little curls out of his face. His eyes were closed while he was trying to concentrate on the pain. I moved my hand from his face over to his cheek, feeling his smooth skin and the warmth it was giving off. I felt his hand grab mine and putting it away from his face, bringing it to his lips and leaving a quick peek.
"I'm so crazy about you, no matter what you do? Even after shit like this."
I smiled a tiny bit.
"Im sorry ok? But yeah you're right. I must admit I'm actually quit fun to be around..if I don't receive some weird ass punishments of course.."
I said in an overly arrogant tone which made Billy smile.
"I promise I'll try my best to keep it together from now on ok? I'm trying to change. For you."
I kissed his cheek.
"Thats really ..nice. Thank you, B."
I smiled and stood up, heading over to take a shower.
"I could get used to your nicknames..",
he said cheekily, looking after me.
"Please don't, it just slipped out."
I could hear him chuckle and closed the door behind me.

(Song: Peter Sandberg - Deep)

I let my clothes fall to the ground and had a stupid smile on my face. That was actually..nice. Normal almost. I wonder what Billy was like before he turned into the person he is now. What were his favorite spots in town? Does he have siblings and if so does he stay in touch with them? Was he ever in love before? What type of movies does he enjoy?
I continued wondering about Billy's life while stepping into the shower, and turning the hot water on. The light streams of water hit my naked body and consumed me with a wave of relaxation. I sunk down to the ground and hugged my knees. I tried to enjoy my alone time when I couldn't ignore the sudden anxiousness that overcame me. I began to breath heavily. I knew all of this was not okay. Thoughts about the people back home rushed through me and I wondered how far the police were. How many more day, weeks or even months they'll need to trace us down. I missed Barb so much. I missed going to shitty party's and I missed serving the same sad old people at work. Silent tears escaped my eyes and I leaned onto the shower wall.
"It's gonna be ok. You will get a job and slowly find your way outta here."
I pep-talked to myself, so quiet, almost I couldn't hear my own voice. I'm so torn about giving into Billy's good side or accepting the fact that he's a sick individual who's in actual need for professional help. I've reached the point to where I'm afraid for him - more so than I'm of him. I'm afraid what would happen to him if he'd ever get caught. I'm afraid of how they would treat him, and then again..I don't know if he even deserved these thoughts.
I wiped my tears away and continued cleaning up.

After another 20 minutes of overthinking I stepped outside again wrapped in a towel and walked back into the living room where saw Billy topless, lifting weights, while smoking a cigarette and listening to the new ACDC album. I stood in the doorway and admired his form for a few moments before he spotted me and put his weights down onto the weight bar. He put his smoke out in a ashtray besides him and casually walked up in front of me.
"Like what you see?"
He asked, slick grin on his face, while resting his pumped arms above the door frame. He was looking at me up and down.
"I actually do." I said adverting my gaze out of embarrassment.
"Woah look at that..no talking back today? Are you sick sunshine?"
He dramatically placed his hand over my forehead, checking my temperature, to which I rolled my eyes and slapped it of off me.
"Can we talk about the job Billy?"
I asked smiling.
He sighed and turned around to sit into the couch.
He patted onto the spot besides him with one hand while his other arm rested on top of the backrest.
"There are two rules you have to follow IF I allow you to go find a job."
He said his gaze turned serious again.
„Well tell me already?!"
I whined in annoyance. He rolled his eyes at me.
„I was about to, shitbird. So. As I was saying, I think there is a videotape renting shop, right around the corner at the bay. If you want to I'm sure I could arrange something for you. BUT only if you adapt a fake identity and wear your wig while working. "
„That's fucking fine with me! And the best thing about it - I'd actually get to do something useful with my „kidnapping time."
I said teasing Billy, grinning at him.
„Oh yeah?",
he raised his eyebrows and with no time to react, he grabbed my thigh as well as my left arm, and sat me on top of him.
„Well if that's the only useful way you know how to use your time I have a couple more ideas in mind."
He was about to lean into me when I swerved out of the way, and patted his shoulder awkwardly.
„Eh..I think I'm good actually. I loooove videotapes so much!"
I said sarcastically and smiled. He let his head fall back and chuckled to himself.
„Thats what I thought."
„Okay well please go talk to the people as soon as possible I can't stand looking at the same white walls and longer!",
I said to which he gave me a quick nod.

Later in the evening I was laying down on the couch, reading some of the books that I found standing around the house, and snacked on some honey melon slices. Billy came through the front door, keys in his hand, and a cigarette burning down between his mouth. He saw me and smiled. I put my book down and raised my brows.
„Where did you come from?", I asked.
„I was down at the shop aka your new job.",
he said proudly and plopped onto the couch as well, after putting my legs on his lap. I instantly sat up and grinned out of excitement.
„What?! How did you do that?! I mean so quickly we just talked about a few hours ago?" I said.
„If there's one thing you don't have to worry about, then it's me, going through with things,                        I say I can do.",
he winked at me. I moved over to him and hugged him tightly.
„That's so fucking cool. Thank you, Billy."
I closed my eyes and so did he.
„Anything for you Y/N.",
he said caressing my hair up and down.
„Your first shift starts tomorrow at 9 AM"
-C