Tangerine ~ Bullet Train

17 - She felt empty

Yuina could remember the moment when she was finally able to buy her own necessities to draw very well. She had saved up a few months of her salary so that she could afford them. For the first time in ages she finally felt something when she walked home with the things carefully stored in her bag. She didn't detect the feeling right away, but eventually she realised she was happy, only if for a brief moment.

Her parents started scolding at her when she got back home with all her new things. Their opinion was that Yuina should've saved the money to go to a fancy college. They always acted like they were rich, but her parents couldn't quite afford her going to one due to big expenses they made. She didn't care; she didn't even want to study. She wanted to be left alone so she could draw and finally feel like she belonged.

The hours she had spent drawing in her own little bubble...

It was stupid, since it was just stuff that could be bought again easily, but Yuina felt like she lost a part of herself when she lost her case. Now here she was, sitting in the seat that was originally bought for her, with the dead son of a mafia boss in the four-seater next to her. She didn't know what to do but to clench the case on the floor with her feet strongly. She felt empty.

On the other side of the train, Tangerine and Lemon made their way back to the wagon it all started in. They had seen it all. When the train stopped, they had gotten out and tried to look for someone holding the case. Well, in Lemon's case, that was. Tangerine was just looking for her. They only just noticed that guy holding the case when Yuina bumped into him, traded hers for it, and got back in.

Lemon had said that she wanted to leave, because she couldn't take it anymore. Now she was still in the train, holding their case even. Tangerine should've been relieved, yet he wasn't. He couldn't begin to think about how she would be feeling right now.

'Lemon,' he said whilst grabbing his brother's arm forcefully, causing him to not being able to enter the wagon just yet. 'What?!' he said annoyed. 'We have to get the case!'

'She will give us the case,' Tangerine said. 'How do you know?!' his brother demanded to know. 'I don't know,' Tangerine replied, 'I just do.'

'You're right,' Lemon said whilst holding on to the gun his brother had given him, 'she will.' Tangerine snapped his hand away, taking the gun from him and storing it inside his pocket. 'Yes, she will,' he then told him. Lemon looked at him as if he were crazy. 'I don't understand you, man! This is a matter of life and death, and you suddenly decide to have a heart?'

'Think about how she must be feeling right now,' Tangerine held on. 'She wanted to leave, yet she is still on this train, to make up for something we did. To try and make sure we would live. If it wasn't for her, we wouldn't be able to deliver the case to the White Death.'

'Nonsense,' Lemon said annoyed. 'We would've gotten out of the train, followed that fucker and made him give up the case. Then, we would've called the White Death and told him we had his case and he could come pick it up.'

'He demanded we got to Kyoto station to give him the case and his son. He doesn't like when things don't go the way he planned them to.'

The Twins looked at each other, not wanting to proceed the way the other wanted to. Lemon didn't care about this girl; he just wanted to get hold on that fucking case and pray the White Death would believe them pinning the body of his son on someone else. Tangerine was fed up with all this and just wanted to be near Yuina again. He had actually read the briefings and knew there wouldn't be a way in which the White Death would let them live. He could still make Yuina leave at Nagoya, but this time he wanted to say goodbye to her properly.

With a heavy heart he pushed Lemon aside and entered the wagon first. Apart from the son's body and Yuina it was empty when they stepped inside. Still, Tangerine felt like the train wasn't empty yet. Glasses was still out there somewhere and Tangerine was sure there would be others.

Yuina of course noticed The Twins walking up to her, but she didn't budge. Not even when they would sit across from her, her being face to face with Tangerine again. She wasn't aware of the fact that they knew she had the case. For all she knew, that man and her were the only ones that did.

'Did you know Riku said he wanted me to stay longer than two weeks?' she said all of a sudden whilst looking at Tangerine, slightly curling the corners of her mouth upwards. 'He was so, so happy with the comics of Dora and Thomas I drew and left for him.' She felt her throat burn and her eyes sting, yet she couldn't bring herself to tear up just yet. She swallowed. 'I'm done,' she said whilst taking a heavy breath. 'Yeahhh,' she continued, stretching out the word, 'I'm done.'

Both men wouldn't move when she would duck and grab the case, putting it on the table whilst making sure they would see the train sticker. They didn't seem surprised when they laid their eyes upon the case and by seeing the look on Tangerine's face, she realised they already knew she had it. They had seen her little stunt back there. They knew she stayed for them, though she wanted to leave earlier.

'What do you want in exchange for the case?' Lemon asked her, talking all business. She didn't know how to react, so she just slid the thing towards the two brothers. 'It's yours.' Lemon didn't seem to believe it would be so easy, yet it was.

'I sincerely hope the White Death will let you live,' Yuina said, especially to Tangerine. She felt the urge to lay her hand on his to feel that connection once more, but she knew she wouldn't be able to brake it off if she did. She already felt connected to him, even if they wouldn't touch. That was why she had to leave. Staying would tear her apart, yet she wasn't sure leaving wouldn't also do that. She stood up. 'Thank you for all you've done for me,' she continued whilst nodding at him in appreciation.

Then he was the one who grabbed her hand. He just couldn't let her leave like that, though he knew he had to. 'Yuina...' he said, but she wished he hadn't said her name, because when he did she felt at peace with it. She didn't know what to do, but she would surely start crying if she would stay here any longer. She didn't want his last memory of her to be weak, so she teared his grip loose.

Maybe it would be better if she wouldn't remember him, but therefore she had to get rid of the only thing she had left that still made her feel something. She reached into her pocket, taking out a piece of paper. It was slightly damaged because of her folding it up a few times, but it was still intact. The drawing would still be visible. When she tried handing it over to Tangerine, he wouldn't take it, so Lemon did. He unfolded it and they now both looked at the drawing she made of Tangerine. It was from when she first saw him. In reality his hair wasn't brushed so neatly anymore but a bit tangled, and he was beaten up a bit, but it was still the way she saw him. As a protector, her cousin had said. Her protector.

'Goodbye,' she said whilst entering the passageway and walking to the hallway.

For a moment Tangerine wasn't able to do anything, but then he stood up. Lemon wouldn't budge. 'Let me through,' Tangerine said, but his brother didn't want to. 'It's over now, man, we have the case,' he said. He felt a little lump in his throat himself because of this goodbye, but he forced himself to think about the future. 'We have to think about how we will handle it from now on.'

'Let me through!' Tangerine yelled. 'Right fucking now!' He kind of forced his brother to move, but Lemon also stood up slightly.

He couldn't let her leave like that, so Tangerine started chasing after her. He didn't have to go far though, because she was just in the hallway. She wasn't alone; a man in a green sweater was holding her, keeping a knife to her throat.