Dear Jackson

Chapter 2

"Dear Jackson, I know you've been my friend for a while now, since middle school. But I've been thinking lately that...what if it was more than that?"

I wrote on a loose leaf paper while leaning my cheek to my hand.

"No, that doesn't even make sense."

I sighed loudly in frustration while crumpling the paper, tossing it in my trash bin next to my desk. I pulled out a new piece of paper and slightly slammed it down, since this was my tenth attempt now. That was the quantity just for today. This "Dear Jackson" thing has been going on for weeks. Each letter I wrote I felt wasn't good enough. I wanted it to be exactly perfect.

"Dear Jackson, how would you feel if I said 'I love you'? Would you-"

"BamBam!"

I heard a knock on my room door and my name being cooed by Jackson's voice. I felt my stomach drop in fear and quickly ripped up my paper into shreds.

"O-one second!"

I made sure to hide my trash can more to the back of my desk, being out of sight. I inhaled to calm my nerves while resting my hand on the door knob. I opened the door and was met with a loud Jackson.

"Hi Bammie!"

"Why didn't you tell me you were coming?"

I quickly replied, kind of upset that I could have been caught writing those letters. He walked in self invited while taking a seat on my bed.

"I wanted to surprise you."

'If only you knew how much you did, bastard.'

"I'm guessing my mother let you in?"

I spoke in a tone of knowing the answer, but still in question. I closed my door and flopped onto the other side of the mattress, keeping my face in a pillow.

"Yeah, I gave her a gift basket too, all related to chocolate. She loved it. But of course she would, I mean it's me who gave it to her."

He boasted egoistically while popping off his shoes and let them fall to the floor, fully laying down. I could feel my heart pumping faster as he snaked his arm around me.

"You okay Bammie? You seem agitated. Should I have told you I was coming? I'm sorry."

'Stop touching me. And yes you should have.'

"No Jackson, I'm fine. And don't apologize, you can come whenever you want. I'm just tired from studying so much."

I lied on the spot. I didn't and couldn't just say he interrupted my love letter to him.

"Yah, you need to stop stressing yourself out so much. Just relax, I don't want you cracking under self pressure."

He spoke quietly while soothing my hair back.

"You should stop caring so much."

His stroking suddenly paused, and his voice was somewhat low and saddened.

"Yeesh, my bad..."

'Great, now I'm an asshole.'

"I'm sorry Jackson. I didn't mean that, I'm just so tired."

He continued his soft massaging, giving a small sigh.

"It's okay, you can fall asleep if you want. I'll watch out for any dangers."

He gave a light chuckle at the end, and I retorted sarcastically.

"What are you, my knight in shining armor?"

"If you want me to be, then sure."

I laughed slightly to myself while feeling my eyes become heavy.

"Shut up and let me rest."

Jackson shifted a little on his side to become more comfortable, exhaling. I could feel his breath on my ear as he did so, and it made me feel even more nervous.

"Whatever you say Bammie."

That annoyingly sweet name was the last thing I heard before drifting into a sound slumber.

---*

I awoke before BamBam, not even knowing I had drifted into a sleep as well. I slowly and carefully pulled my arm away from his body while standing up on my feet. I didn't want to wake him up and cause crankiness.

"I think I'll just leave a note before I go."

I spoke to myself while walking over to his desk. I grabbed a piece of blank loose leaf paper from a stack of multiple, and a pen laying uncapped on the surface.

"Hey Bammie, I went home early. I'll see you at school tomorrow.~"

I jotted down while furrowing my eyebrows in focus. I then folded it in half, and left it to rest on my side that I slept on.

"Well I got some sleep, but I didn't get to hang out with BamBam."

I sighed loudly feeling kind of disappointed. I pulled out my phone to check the time, and gave a nod to myself.

"It's late in the night. It is best if I just head home before my parents have a heart attack."

I exhaled again as now I didn't even have a choice of staying. I slipped my shoes back onto my feet, and approached the door. Pulling it open I stepped out into the hallway. I gave one last look at Bam before closing it fully, smiling to myself as it shut completely.

---

I walked home rather quickly since it was dark out. By the time I made it to my house, everyone was already in their rooms and ready for bed. I decided to skip dinner as I was not in the mood for food at the moment. Though I did stop in the kitchen to grab a bottle of water from the fridge. I went up the stairs and entered my room as soon as it was in sight.

"I still feel as if BamBam was upset at me."

I spoke while taking a seat at my art table, opening my sketchbook to a marked page. I examined my unfinished drawing of my best friend, seeing where I should start off.

"Would he find it creepy if I gave this to him as a gift? Wouldn't it be even weirder if it's me sketching out just him on my free time? Then again, he has over four hundred pictures of just me..."

I kept on speaking and thinking to myself while picking up my pencil, tapping it against my chin.

"Maybe I'll just add it to the other twenty sketches I have of him."

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A/N: QUICK NOTICE! This "--*" means the POV (point of view) is changing from one character to another. Only when the "*" is next to the divider. If it's just the lines, then it's still the same POV. Please leave any feedback as it motivates my lazy self.