𝙴𝚢𝚎𝚜 𝚘𝚏 𝙻𝚘𝚟𝚎

Chapter Three: Letting Lovers Go

"Missing pieces of my skull, I'll sew on patches of my own soul; there's nothing you or I can do so let the stars fall"

- Meteor Shower by Cavetown

I would have rather been stabbed than feel the sting of a heartbreak. The difference between the two is that if I get stabbed, it will heal. A broken heart will not. The memory of Ivy will forever haunt me, and I will always cherish the happy memories we've shared.

I was woken up this morning by the ringing of my alarm. My cheeks were flushed and tear stained, and my eyelids were heavy. I stretched my arm out, reaching for my phone to turn off the loud repeated noise. I sighed and dropped my arm, giving up. I closed my eyes and attempted to drift back asleep, ignoring the alarm. I groaned and put my hood over my head and tightened the drawstrings. It rang and rang and rang over and over, until I finally sat up, grabbed my phone from the nightstand, turned off the alarm and threw it across the room, hitting the wall. I groaned again, flopped on my bed and snatched the covers over my head. I reached my hand from under the blanket and grabbed my pillow, and held tight in my arms as I sniffed my nose. I cried like a baby until my mom came into the room.

"What's wrong?" She asked me, annoyed, as if she was busy.

"I'm sad." I pouted, as I peeked my teary eyes and small running nose out from the covers.

"Why are you sad?" My mom scoffed.

"Me and Ivy broke up yesterday," I cried. "I thought she loved me!" I sniffed my nose, and whipped my tears with my sleeve.

"So that's why you didn't help me unpack yesterday, I had to do it all by myself." My mom sighs, as she lifts my blanket off of me. I sigh and tilt my head to the left, facing the wall.

"I'm heartbroken mom, what should I do?" I whine.

"You should've listened to me in the first place, I told you it wasn't a good idea to date at this age, but you didn't listen." My mom scoffs, and tosses her hair. "Now get up and have breakfast. Today is the last day of summer break, and tomorrow is the first day of school." I groaned and sat up, rubbed my eyes and ran my fingers through my hair. "Go have a shower." My mom says. I stand up, and waddle over to the bathroom. I take my hoodie off and get undressed.

I switch the shower on to the hottest level. The boiling water trickles from the shower head. I stare at myself in the mirror before getting in the shower. I stare at all my little flaws that no one notices except me. I stare and all I can see is the things wrong with my body and my face. My nose is too big, I think to myself. My eyes are too small. My body is too skinny. My legs are too fat, too hairy. My smile looks weird. My teeth are yellow. My face is not normal looking. I sigh and turn away from the mirror, and step into the shower. The hot water sprays and splashes onto my brown hair. Droplets run down my face and fall into my eyes, a stinging and burning feeling it gives me. My feet turn red from the heat of the shower, and I stand there. A part of me deep down in my heart tells me, "Everything will be okay." I run my fingers through my wet hair and say "That's what people have been telling me since my brother died, but things have only gotten worse."

I switch the shower off and fling the curtain open. I step out of the shower, grab a towel from the racket and wrap it around my chest. Water droplets drip down from my wet hair, trickle down my throat and land on my shoulders. I groan and waddle back to my room, dry myself off and get dressed. I put on my soft, light brown sweater that my mom had bought for me last year, a silver necklace with a little amethyst butterfly that hangs from it, and my loose gray jeans I wear quite often. In the kitchen, my mom makes me a cup of coffee, with a bit of milk and a lot of sugar, just how I like it. "You look nice." My mom compliments me. I smile and sit down on one of the tall wooden stools with my hot cup of coffee in hand. I gulp it down and place the mug in the sink. "Today you can go look around the city by yourself if you like, Abby." My mom suggests.