CALI.

Chapter 12 • Not Ready Yet.

I cried for a couple days strait. Haven't been to school in a little over two months. Didn't answer the phone. Ariella came over a couple times, but I didn't let her in. Truency comes every day, but What was I going to do? I

sat in my room in the dark, I noticed I hadn't showered in a couple days. Depression kicked in pretty soon after the incident. I sat in the corner of my room. I felt like the fucking grudge. Admitting, that made me laugh a little. I can't do this for the rest of my life. But I wanted to. I lost so much weight, lost everyone. They all stopped coming.

Truency still comes to check on me, I flash my light on and off to let them know I'm alive and they seem to give me a break. My family comes over a lot. I don't let them in. Ayden... Ayden texts me often still. I hate leaving him unreplied, wondering if I'm okay. I sighed.

And wiped the tear falling from my left eye. And got up for the first time in hours. I headed strait to the bathroom. Turned on the shower and the bathroom began to fill with steam. My lack of movement lately made me pretty out of shape and most little things made me tired. But still I bent down and drew off my underwear then pulled my t-shirt over my head. The shower felt good. Loosened me up. I turned the shower off and grabbed my towel.

I got dressed as energetic and happy as I could be. Trying to get my mood up. I threw on a shirt dress with sandals and put my hair in a pony tail. Finnaly I cleaned up my room and opened my blinds to the windows that covered my wall and looked over the yard. I smiled a little due to my sudden jump back to the intense light. Well techniquilly it was sunset on a hot June day so not super bright but I haven't been exposed to it in a while. I headed downstairs and past the living room before something caught my eye and made me then around.

Cali: Ayden!?

My shock level was so high I didn't have time to be mad. He immediately jumped up from the couch were he'd been layed watching TV.

Ayden: Cali?

He said in reply. Super excited and probably happy I was alive.

Cali: What are yo-

I was cut off by him hugging me

Ayden: Cali, I've missed you so much I've bee-
Cali: What.are.you.doing.here.Ayden.

I said pushing him away.

Ayden: look, don't be mad. I've been coming here on and off. It started when you wouldn't answer my texts. Or my calls. Or some to the door. Cali, I literally thought you killed yourself. Not even Ariella knows what the hells going on with you.

My mood shifted back to upset. But not the same upset, upset of how I've been treating people.

Cali: Ayden I'm so so-
Ayden: Don't be, we know what you're going through right now. If anything you needed the time you took. But I mean what about school?
Cali: I'm pretty sure I'm failing..
Ayden: Are you going to go back?
Cali: I don't know yet.
Ayden: we don't have to talk about it. Cali: that'd help.
Ayden: okay well what have you been doing lately?

I started back off to the kitchen and he followed sitting at the island.

Cali: um, nothing really. I sit upstairs all day every day. I eat sometimes, and shower sometimes... I cry a lot.

I phased before grabbing the juice, thinking back to the past couple months. The. Gathering myself quickly and snatching it out of the fridge.

Cali: But I'm going to start trying now. Get up out of bed, go outside maybe.
Ayden: Yeah, I know, I've barely seen you downstairs. Well not at all.
Cali: uh-
Ayden: Sorry, creepy I know.
Cali: how long exactly have you been staying here?
Ayden: only like 2 weeks...

My mouthed dropped. Have I really been that out of it that I didn't notice that.

Ayden: um, I heard the shower running, so you-
Cali: yeah, I guess its my attempt at living.

I grabbed a cup from the cubbard and began pouring my juice.

Ayden: Hey, can i , uh- take you out?
Cali: like outside?

I said serious but he took it as a joke.

Ayden: yeah outside.

I went to answer but was interrupted. I swear if this boy don't let me finish a sentence today. And wither way, I was not ready to leave.

Ayden: You know what. You don't have a choice. Let's go.

He grabbed my arm and led me to the front door. He grabbed the knob but turned to my before opening the door.

Ayden; are you ready?

He said with a huge smile.

Cali: Ayden I really don't think-

And then the door was open and I was standing on the porch. I really don't think I'm ready yet.