Five Words

Chapter 52

~Cher

My mind is starting to fail, like an engine that turns over and over again without kicking into action. I can't formulate a thought, except one.

Ace is gone.

I drag my feet slowly in order to get out of the room. The room is overflowing with memories of us together, in here. They're all closing in on me like a cage that's sealing off every viable exit for me to escape. His journal is not on the desk like every other day. The sheets are dirty meaning that his suitcase was on the bed while he was packing everything preparing to leave me. The closet doors are slightly agape, and I open them widely to find all his clothes gone.

I can't breathe in here. All I can breathe in is his cologne wrapping itself around every air particle in the room making it very hard on me to breathe.

"He's not here, is he?"

I raise my head and see Eric standing at the door with his hand gripping the door handle tightly.

I open my mouth to answer him, but my mind fails me. I close my mouth when no words are falling off my tongue. I nod my head feebly at him and he sighs.

He steps forward and his hand reaches for mine. He pulls my hand and he starts walking pulling me behind him. I let him lead me because I don't know what else this night holds.

"I left him for only five minutes until I reached you. The bus couldn't have possibly left. He must be at the station now."

He must've been planning this with Eric all along. All the secretive calls in the middle of the day and at night when he used to excuse himself for a little while then come back with a wide smile glowing on his perfectly plump lips. He didn't want anyone to know about this, and he has succeeded. But why is Eric helping me now? He should be leaving with Ace or if he weren't to leave with Ace, then he would still be sitting with us downstairs over dinner.

What about Paulina? Did she know too?

"What're you doing?"

"I'm taking you to the bus station. It's a five-minute walk, but we'll have to walk faster because we're losing time." Eric answers me and he picks up the pace.

My legs start moving faster to be able to catch up with him.

"Why are you taking me to him?"

"You have to trust me on this one, Cher. Tell him how you feel."

Tell him how I feel? Didn't I already do that a million times last night? When I was kissing him? When I was pouring my heart and soul out into everything I was giving him? When I was speaking to him? When the words slipped from me last night? When I was hugging him today morning? When I slept between his arms every single night and never wanted to leave? Didn't he get it?

How can he not get it? Do I need to scream the words out for him so that his brain can understand? He said he wants me too, but what is he doing now?

Tell him, cherié. Tell him maybe you can make him stay.

Chantelle was so sure that I can make him stay. She believed it. I have always hung onto the hope of him staying because I changed something inside of him that made him want to stay. Right now, I'm not sure anything changed in him.

"There he is."

Eric leaves my hand, but I would really wish for him to hold it again. I might not go talk to him. I might melt right here in my ground and he will leave and never notice anything and that will be the end. It is a perfect summer night. The air is sweet and the breeze is cool. The stars are shimmering in the night sky, lighting up the streets for everyone. There is no one out here that isn't smiling or laughing, except the three of us. Eric, Ace, and I. The world is rotating, and people are moving on, cars are passing by, and life is continuing, but why aren't I part of this motion?