Even In The Grave, All Is Not Lost

You Could Break Me

A/N: Okay, I lied! I said this chapter would be out sooner and it wasn't. I end up having a major crash (PEM) and it set me back a lot. Sorry.

. . .

Trigger Warning: reference to self-harm and suicide

. . .

"Don't worry," he would say, smiling. "Dying is much more difficult than one imagines."

― Gabriel García Márquez, One Hundred Years of Solitude

. . .

"So that's a no?"

"That's a no."

Luna smiled slightly, watching Raven. Even though her words hadn't been a test, she couldn't help but be pleased by the response they'd received. Relieved even.

But she'd known, even before now, that Raven valued individual life. That she wasn't likely to shove one person under water in order to keep a greater number afloat.

Luna had seen the proof of it - in a gun lowered to the ground, a weapon made useless.

She frowned, remembering Adria.

What she'd done.

On that day, Luna had valued individual life far too much.

Perhaps Adria's death had been a punishment. A reminder that forsaking her vow, putting one life before another, could never lead to anything good. Who lived and who died, that choice wasn't hers to make.

Adria was fated to die all along. Her death written in the stars.

Luna couldn't change that. No matter who she sacrificed. All she'd done was delay the inevitable.

(and yet a part of her didn't regret it. Couldn't regret those extra days she'd stolen with Adria. The days she'd sold her soul for)

It was a relief that she wouldn't be called upon to make such a choice again. That for once her blood had placed her in a position to save life rather than take it. Save it without sacrifice.

Though, the chances of that actually happening were dwindling by the day.

Praimfaya drew closer and closer - and her blood remained nothing but a curse inside her veins. It had yet to prove itself.

Perhaps it never would.

"How long do you think we have?"

Raven glanced over at her. "You mean of being stuck inside this hell room?"

"Until Praimfaya hits."

She occupied herself with the tablet on her lap. "I don't know, weeks? Days? I mean, it could be months but. . ."

"You don't think so."

Luna had feared as much.

Raven shrugged, still avoiding her gaze. "There's no real way to know for sure. Before we left Arkadia, my last calculations gave us about two months, probably less. If I was right then we still have over a month. But considering my first calculation was six months and then we lost four of those. . . I guess I'm just trying to prepare for the worst."

"I understand."

In truth, Luna was less interested in how long humanity had left than in how long Raven did.

She needed to prepare herself.

She hadn't been prepared for Adria. Or Derrick. Or Nyko.

Not Lincoln or Lexa, either.