𝐒𝐄𝐍𝐒𝐀𝐓𝐈𝐎𝐍, 𝐬𝐤𝐳

consume pt. 2

tw: arguments, cursing, abusive father (not proofread)

"na-bi."

"dad?!"

i look at the security and jyp, confusion and anger in my eyes. i feel ryujin hold my hand from behind me. 

"what are you doing here, dad? why are you here? i'm not giving you any money." i say, saltiness clear in my voice.

"listen, i just wanted to ask you if i could come back in your life. i know you hate me, but i miss you." he says, fiddling with his hands.

i ball the hand that ryujin isn't holding into a tight fist and close my eyes. i don't want my anger to control me.

"you hurt mom, i'm never letting you in my life because of that. i swear to god if i call mom right now and she tells me you're entering her life again, you will never see the light of day again. not only did you hurt mom, you hurt me, and my brothers. you're an abusive piece of shit, dad. even if you changed, i don't think i could ever trust you again."

he starts walking toward me and i'm scared he might do something again to me, but instead he tries to hug me.

i shove him off of me, "don't touch me. you don't deserve to." i'm crying at this point, and so is he. ryujin tightens her grip on my hand as if to say she's scared. 

"i'm sorry, na-bi. i didn't mean to hurt you, any of you. it's not like you were a good kid either, begging to become an idol at 13."

i scoff and roll my eyes at him. "see, dad? this is why you shouldn't be in my life. you are a shitty person. you did mean to hurt us. you drank all the time. you did nothing but lay around as mom and i took care of everything. i was 7 when you told me i was supposed to be the woman of the house, when you couldn't even man up enough to make money! you RUINED mom's LIFE. YOU DID. so i don't wanna hear an 'i'm sorry,' because that is so pathetic. check yourself into a mental hospital on your way home. i don't ever wanna see you again. bye, dad."

"let's go ryujin." i hold her hand on the way out and slam the door. i start walking faster and faster, and all the people in the halls are looking at me, concerned, probably. i eventually let go of ryujin and sprint to the nearest empty room i can find.

i find an empty practice room and ball up in the corner. i sob until i can't breathe and just sit there for a bit. i hear the door open and don't even bother to wipe my tears. i hear footsteps walk over to me and whoever it is lay their hand on me.

"na-bi, are you okay?" i recognize that voice. it's felix. i look up and once he sees my bright red eyes and sad expression he hugs me, rubbing my back to soothe me.

"hey, shhh. what happened?" i start choking up again and some tears slip out.

"my dad." he looks shocked, knowing that i cut all contact from my dad. i explain everything that just happened and he hugs me tighter.

"oh my god, na-bi. i'm so sorry that happened. you did the right thing, though. if you need anything, you have me, ryujin, chan, hyunjin, minho, and everyone else. i love you, you know that?"

"mhm. i love you, too, lix."

i hear the door open again and ryujin comes running into the room.

"there you are. i was looking everywhere for you! let's go get some ice cream and watch a movie, felix, bring the people."

welp- that was a good chapter to vent in- 

anywaysss i'll continue this next chapter, i just wanted to put something out there before i forgot. bye bye guys!! ty for reading!

- cait