Six months to live (ZhanYi)

15

After what happened last time at the prison, Yibo has been thinking about it nonstop. It was just so good. He truly thinks he's never felt anything so pleasurable in his life.

He thinks though, that maybe it had to do with the fact that his feelings for Zhan are so strong and also that he feels comfortable with him. The thrill of being in a prison also helped a little too.

Yibo wonders, if he would feel the same if he and Zhan had met more conventionally. Would he feel the same amount of attachment as he does now? Maybe if Zhan had more than two months left, if he had forever left, Yibo wouldn't feel so desperate for him.

It's a scary thought really. It makes Yibo wonder if any of his feelings for Zhan are real. He knows that the feeling he gets in his stomach when he sees Zhan is real, and that the sadness he feels in his heart when he has to leave is real, but is it only a symptom of a placebo type of love?

He's never felt this way about anyone before and he finds it odd that of all people Zhan's the one that's changed that. Of all the people who could've been his first heartbreak, it'll be Zhan.

Yibo's not sure if he'll ever get the answers to his questions, and really, he's not sure if he even wants to.

As soon as Yibo finds his wallet and jacket he hurries downstairs to the car, finding the cold wind that thrashes against his cheeks extremely unpleasant and unwanted. He doesn't mind the cold if it's not windy or gloomy but on a day like today, he very dearly misses the sun.

Zhan ge bearly sees the sun, he thinks as they drive on the highway. Yibo knows for a fact that it can take a toll on one's mental health if they don't get enough vitamin D. Maybe that's something Zhan could use.

Every time Yibo sees the prison it just looks duller and duller. As they pull into the parking lot, he's reminded of this. The way the cement walls are tiresome and plain and the yard looks dry and flat, as if it just soaks up all of the negative energy that's above it.

As he walks inside he's met with the monotonous hum of the lighting, a sound that could potentially drive someone mad. Even the guards tend to always have the same uninspired looks on their faces. It's
depressing to say the least.

"You are beginning to like it here, Yibo?" Mrs. Sandra at the sign-in desk asks, shuffling through some papers, peering at Yibo over the top of her thin wired glasses.

"I am, Mrs. Sandra, I really am," Yibo says back to her, a smile drawing across his face at the thought of his time with Zhan.

"That's good sweetie, I'm sure you make his day. Go on in, she said.

Yibo nods. "Yes ma'am, have a good rest of the day."

Mrs. Sandra gives Yibo a sweet smile, one that only certain people can give. Usually, those people are older women. At least that's what Yibo has found.

As he walks through the dimly lit halls, one that resembles the rest of the prison, he thinks about how this is the entirety of Zhan's world. The only things he sees are what's inside this building and the bit of the actual world that's visible from the yard.

He makes it to the room, the dull one but Yibo is not complaining.

Yibo knocks but doesn't really wait for an answer to walk in. He finds Zhan laying on the floor with his knees bent up. He's doing sit-ups.

"Oh, Yibo," Zhan says, sitting up all the way.

Zhan has sweat coating his forehead and bare arms that are revealed by his sleeveless white tank top. Tattoos are scattered across his arms and Yibo thinks they compliment his skin very well