Let me be free
I look for all of the reasons why
Happiness is something I can't find
Need to just breathe
It's the downfall of me and my mind
Numb - Pale Waves
♡
Aria
I watched the headlights of cars fly by in the dark. Fresh tears rolled down my face. I had been up for hours, the rest of the boys already passed out on the bus. Sneaking out of Luke's embrace was tougher than I thought. Thankfully he is a heavy sleeper.
My phone was providing the only light in the dark living area. This morning the Ghost of You video dropped and it was a surreal experience. Watching Luke and I on screen was actually really beautiful. I'm not sure how I didn't realize it at the time, but Luke's eyes were shining with love. It truly was as obvious as everyone said it was.
Unfortunately, I wasn't the only one to realize this. When the video dropped this morning, I posted one of the pictures of Luke and I from the set. It was a snapshot from when he dipped me, both of us laughing. The caption of the post was simple, something I crafted to not hint at our relationship.
@ariawestfield: The Ghost of You video is officially out! This was my first and probably last acting gig. Thankfully I had a great partner ♡ Go check out the video!
I had been so busy during the day that I didn't even get the chance to check any of my notifications until now. We've been officially sleeping on the tour bus for a week now and I am still struggling. I have been able to control my fear of cars when I am able to see what is going on but attempting to sleep in one has been nearly impossible. Any time I close my eyes, memories invade my thoughts. Most nights I have laid awake in Luke's arms. The lack of sleep is really starting to catch up to me.
So, that's how I found myself sitting on the couch browsing through my phone. I expected my notifications to be flooded but not to the magnitude that they were. Crystal warned me before that no matter what some people are gonna like me and others are going to hate without reason. The hate I was receiving didn't shock me...that was expected. What shocked me was the amount I was receiving considering Luke and I still haven't gone public. It made me want to never come out to the public.
Curiosity brought me to the YouTube comments first. A majority of them, thankfully, were actually pretty nice. They didn't even really talk about me, more just about the music video. There were a few comments about me that weren't the kindest but overall it wasn't the worst. I felt partly relieved at the minimum comments until I pulled up my Instagram.
@lover_of_5S0S487: Look at the way she looks at Luke, I feel bad for his poor girlfriend. Must be tough to know this slut got to be all over Luke
@easiersupremacy35: you don't deserve to be that close to him
@mukemukemuke: the fact that she got the tour gig makes a lot of sense now. How many of them did you have to sleep with to get the job?
@lukesrealgirlfriend: I want someone to look at me the way Luke looks at you. Are you the secret girlfriend?
@lukesbabyblues: it must have been so hard for him to act like he liked you let alone loved you
@afi_lrh_cth_mgc: how does it feel to know someone as great as him will never love you? Hope you enjoyed your 5 seconds of fame
@crystalleigh: My bestie is so beautiful! Don't let the haters get to you.
YOU ARE READING
Ghost of You ♡ LRH
Fanfic"Luke it looks like you've seen a ghost." "That's because I'm staring at one." ♡ He was told that she died, so how could she possibly be standing right in front of him? ♡ Started August 7, 2022 ♡ Completed January 14, 2023 ♡ #1 - Ghost of You (11/0...