This time, I took her hand in mine, leading her to my bike. I hand her the extra helmet that I brought before helping her hop on the bike. She pulls her dress up just a little so that she can sit properly on it.
"Ready?" I said as I ready my bike.
"Wait hold on." She held on to my waist, hugging me and resting her head on my back. "Ready."
There are even less cars on the road. It was 2:30 am and the breeze was even colder, although I don't feel half as cold.
"You okay back there?" I asked when we stopped by the red light.
"Never been better."
As we crossed the Brooklyn bridge, B lets go of my waist and stands up. Screaming her lungs out, the cold air doesn't seem to bother her. I slowed down to let her enjoy her moment, she needed this. I've never had a moment like this with my ex, she hated my bike let alone riding with me. All I want is a little moment like this with someone, enjoying the night as best as we could even when everything falls apart. Maybe I'm just having a tunnel vision right now, but I truly couldn't ask for more.
"Careful B!" I warned her.
Halfway through the bridge B's lungs seems to have given up with her screaming, she sat back down and wrapped her arms around me again, letting her body rest on mine. Her energy seems endless, but the little ball of energy needs her rest too.
"We are almost there." I announced, I felt her nod on my back.
~
"We're here B." I said as I took my helmet off and proceed to hop off my bike. "Want to come with?"
She took the helmet off, I can't really describe her expression.
"It's fine if you don't want to, I can send you back to your place." I really don't mind, I don't want to make her uncomfortable.
"Oh no no, sorry I'm just still a little drunk." She said as she struggles to hop off my bike.
"Here, hold on to my shoulder." I moved closer so she can hold on to my shoulder, taking her other hand in mind and holding her waist, lifting her a little making it easier for her to get off the bike.
"Thanks George." She smiled. "Lead the way, I'm not too familiar."
I chuckled. Leading the way back to my place. "Sorry a little messy." I didn't expect company tonight, of course as a recent bachelor, my place is a tad bit messy. "You can sit wherever."
"I don't mind." She reassured as she sat herself down on the couch right in the middle of my living room.
"Do want to drink more? I have some wine if you would like that." I offered.
"Hmmmm...." I can hear her contemplate from the kitchen. "Maybe a little? If you don't mind, can I have some ice water too please?"
"Sure princess." That kind of just rolls off of my tongue, I quickly covers my mouth.
"Princess?" She looks at me strangely when I brought over the wine and water.
"The uhh.. the dress made you look like one." I feel nervous all of a sudden.
"Sure....." She teased, I quickly diverted my attention to my phone, trying to play any song that I see fit the mood, Arctic Monkey's AM seems like a great fit for the night.
"Do you want to smoke?" I offered my cigarette box to her before taking one for myself.
"You're smoking inside?" She asked, taking a stick regardless.
"Too lazy for the rooftop." I shrugged.
"Fair, It's getting cold too." I nod in agreement. "Thanks by the way."
"For what?" I asked.
"For being cool...." She paused. "and for not leaving."
"Don't mention it, I guess i needed the company too."
"I think I wouldn't be able to handle another person leaving me tonight." She sighed, letting her body relax on the couch. "I was about to go on a whole night bender if it wasn't for you."
"Glad I could help a little." I glanced at her who seems to be lost in her own thoughts.
"Sometimes, I don't really know what I'm looking for out here you know?" I just listen to her rants, letting my body relaxed on the couch too, staring at her beside me who's eyes are fixed on the ceiling. "I feel like I've lived a thousand lives and yet here I am still searching. I just never knew who I was, what am I, where I belong, what I want. Everything seems so pointless."
"What exactly are you looking for?" I reluctantly asked.
"My soul." She took a long drag from her cigarette and blew it away to the ceiling. "I just want to feel something."
"Feeling something seems like a drag to me." The memories of 'her' suddenly hits me like a ton of bricks, I diverted my eyes to the ceiling, trying to not shed a tear. "I want to be like you."
"Don't be," She breaths out a chuckle. "I'm your worst nightmare."
"If you are, you're probably my favourite worst nightmare."
"Really?" She turned her head slightly, focusing her eyes on me, but I just kept my gaze on the ceiling. "You just knew me."
"Nightmares don't usually need to lasts that long." I explained. "But the feelings will last."
"I hope you'll remember me for sometimes."
"I think I will."
We sat there for a little while, just enjoying the comfortable silence, occasionally taking a swig from our wine glasses. The night feels colder and i felt her body moved closer to mine, trying to find a little warmth that I could offer.
"Is this okay?"
"Yeah this is fine." I wrap my hand around her after setting my wine glass back on the table.
"Do you think I'll find whatever it is i'm looking for?" She asked out of the blue.
"Eventually." I paused. "You still have plenty of times."
"I hope so."
"Even when you can't find it, there's nothing wrong about riding this shit out, don't you think?"
"You're talking like a true biker." I chuckled, well she's not wrong.
"And I thought this was a judgment free zone." I joked.
"Hey I didn't say it was wrong, just stating a fact." she tried to defend herself.
"alright alright I believe you."
Another silence fell as No.1 Party anthem starts playing, Alex Turner's voice soots away a tinge of pain that I felt in my chest.
"Hey George?" I felt her head moves I look down from the ceiling to find her looking at my eyes intently, our faces are closer than before when we were in the club. I don't feel nervous anymore, I feel content.
"Yeah?"
"Don't be sad okay?" I didn't know what took over me that made me eliminate all the gaps between us.
A/N: NSFW in the next chapter, i'm warning ya.
YOU ARE READING
No.1 party anthem
Hayran Kurgu"Nightmares don't usually need to lasts that long." I explained. "But the feelings will last." "I hope you'll remember me for sometimes." "I think I will."
