To Have and To Hold

Chapter 18

"You know she gave mother a letter for me a while back?"

"Oh, so you got it..."

"So, you know about it." He shot his sister an accusatory look. Was she betraying him now, too?

"I just know she was pretty mad at herself for writing it. She went to get it back from mother- but she said she'd already given it to you."

Which would explain the voicemail.

"Michael- I know your mother gave you a letter. I hope to God you threw it out and never read it. I don't know what I was thinking. I was upset...drunk. Well, you know by now I do crazy things when I get like that. I'm sorry if I upset you- with the letter, I mean...and...ah...everything else. Anyway...I guess they say drunks say the truth...so..whatever. I just wanna let you know...shit...not sure what. I hope you're happy. You deserve to be. And I never deserved you- so guess we both got our just desert after all. Fucked up though that I seem to know now why you could never love me...when that's all I ever wanted. Shit- I better go. I love you- don't laugh- and if you believe nothing else. Believe that. And that I am so fucking horrible sorry...for everything."

"Yeah.I got that. It wasn't like her...at all..."

Neither was the voicemail. Something was very off about her voice, her tone. Internal alarm bells went off- and he silenced them, calling himself a sappy idiot. Still, he almost called her...and then Debbie went into labor and everything else was pushed to the background.

"What you mean?"

"She apologized."

Janet's laughter startled him.

"She apologized? For what?"

His eyes narrowed.

"For stuff. Why do you say it that way?"

"Ok, you probably gonna kick me out- but you know what? I'm not gonna walk around you on eggshells. What did she have to apologize for?"

For lying, for cheating, for...for...for making him fall in love with her.

"Why do you women always stick together? She filed for divorce, Dunk. She hurt me- she walked out on me. She..." He shook his head.... "Never mind..." Some things did not have to be shared. No matter what.

"Correct me if I'm wrong. But from what I hear, you started eyeing alternatives while you were married. Don't play the saint with me, Mike. I know better."

Blood cursed through his veins, making him feel like exploding.

"I never cheated on Lisa. Never. So, how dare she tell you I did?"

"She didn't. And that's not what I mean. I meant an alternative for having children, Michael. Do you really think those of us close to you buy the whole 'I'm happily married to the mother of my son'-bullshit?"

"Well, I am married to Debbie. She came through for me. It is a legal marriage,- you better believe it."

Quickly, he swallowed the rising bile, fighting the nauseous wave before it buried him again. Oh yeah, that marriage was legal. No one could contest it- and Deb couldn't pull a fast one and file for annulment and custody.