Over The Bridge

🧷 XII

After maybe another 15 minutes, Yeonjun moved so they could leave the room and they went back into Yeonjun's room. "Can you tell me where they are so I can hide them from you?" Taehyun asked Yeonjun, and Yeonjun told him where they all were, also telling Taehyun to be careful since some of them were just recently sharpened and in places he might cut his finger open grabbing them. Taehyun wouldn't just throw them away, he knew Yeonjun and even if he promised he'd stop, he'd dig them out of the trash and do it all again.

So Taehyun got all the blades and, first of all, cleaned them all carefully and he then decided he'd just take them so Yeonjun wouldn't find them if he was looking. Taehyun carefully put them in the sole of his shoe when Yeonjun went into the bathroom, making sure they wouldn't hurt him. When Yeonjun came out of the bathroom he was going to give Taehyun some of his clothes to wear.

Taehyun had never had to explain why he suddenly was staying with Yeonjun, since Taehyun's parents knew how suicidal he was. Taehyun changed his clothes and laid down with Yeonjun.

Without much thought, Yeonjun moved so he was laying next to Taehyun.

Taehyun knew about the things Beomgyu saw when he was with Yeonjun and Taehyun had seen them too..

"Junnie... where are you going..?"

"To see Arin."

"But you can't just leave me..."

"Watch me."

"But-"

"Shut up," Yeonjun said as he quickly kissed Taehyun to shut him up before turning back around and continuing in the direction he was going.

Taehyun was left shocked but only for a moment before he continued to follow behind Yeonjun. It was a little too late when Taehyun noticed where he was going and it was too late to stop him.

Taehyun watched in complete shock and pain as Yeonjun didn't hesitate to climb over the railing of the bridge.

"I love you Taehyun..." Yeonjun said, turning around, to look at Taehyun.

"Junnie...!!"

He fell backward, into the Han River. Taehyun had tears streaming down his face.

The next thing Taehyun knew, he had seemed to have woken up but he wasn't sleeping. He realized Yeonjun was still in his arms and he relaxed. Every time Taehyun saw one of these, it made his anxiety so much worse. He really didn't want to lose Yeonjun.

He loved Yeonjun, he really did. He was glad Yeonjun agreed to this 'fake dating' thing, mainly because Taehyun just really wanted to be with Yeonjun. He would be there for Yeonjun, regardless of what happens, I mean Taehyun really fucking loves Yeonjun. He would do anything for Yeonjun, and he means anything. I mean if Yeonjun was really about to cut, Taehyun would actually let Yeonjun hurt him instead. He didn't know what he would do if he ever lost Yeonjun, he would be lost, Yeonjun was his happiness. It wasn't good Yeonjun was the reason he was happy, but it was true. He was pretty sure that Yeonjun only agreed so he didn't feel so lonely. Taehyun knew it probably wasn't healthy for either of their mental states. But that pain would come later, now they could just enjoy what they had... right? Taehyun didn't want to hurt him or Yeonjun but he thought it would all be fine, or maybe not in the long run. Taehyun's worst fear was hurting Yeonjun and he didn't realize how this could actually hurt him a lot. Taehyun never knew how much he could hurt Yeonjun. Taehyun probably seemed selfish when he asked Yeonjun to be his boyfriend. While in reality, Yeonjun had only agreed because he didn't want to hurt Taehyun.

God they were both so fucking dumb. Seemingly hurting themselves for each other. Except it hurt Taehyun a whole lot later when he realized Yeonjun actually only agreed to try and forget his crush on Beomgyu. It wasn't good if that's what it was. Taehyun hoped it wasn't to try and get over Beomgyu, he really did. But he knew that was something Yeonjun would actually do, sadly.

...

The next day, Yeonjun wasn't brought into the principal's office but there were people all day saying shit to him. It really was stressing him out, and of course Beomgyu noticed something was up. At lunch, Yeonjun didn't look at Soobin since he sat with them, and it wasn't because what they did that night, it was because of everybody else making it a complete mess. Heuning Kai knew something was up between Soobin and Yeonjun and he wasn't sure what it was exactly. It did concern him, and he wondered if that night completely ruined their friendship, which it seemed like right about now. He didn't know about parts of it being online and completely ruining Yeonjun's reputation.

Then as Yeonjun was getting ready to leave for the day, this one bitch had the nerves to go up to Yeonjun and say, "God you are such an attention seeking whore, if you say you're gonna kill yourself, just do it already and maybe quit showing off on the internet."

Before Yeonjun could say anything back, she was lost in the crowd. When he sat down in his seat on the bus, he seen his phone getting notifications from Instagram. Hate comments, and he even had people DMing him to kill himself and be with his sister. He screenshotted the messages and reported the accounts and blocked them. He also blocked all the accounts leaving hate comments. He didn't need to see that, especially now given he was just barely holding on.

Yeonjun was ashamed to tell any of the guys about the comments and messages, since all of them said he was just wanting attention and every other mean thing, and things regarding the video. He was terrified now that he wouldn't be able to get into a company at all, but because of the entire party incident, it basically ruined his chances of achieving his dream.

When he got home, he completely ignored his phone. He felt lost, alone, and overall, empty. The comments and the DMs were getting to him. He kept telling himself not to let them get to him. He remembered his mom telling him to talk to her, but he didn't want to bug her. He just wanted to die, and it seemed like everybody else did too.