Beautifully Imperfect {ON HOLD}

Chapter Thirteen: "Take care of her for me."

As the weeks went on you and Lady Lesso had gotten significantly closer. You sleeping in her room became a regular thing to help you with your night terrors. She also helped you during what the two of you decided to call your "episodes". You have been three weeks clean and are still working on your eating. Your grades went up significantly and you would work with Lady Lesso if you needed help on certain subjects. You had also befriended two other readers that had arrived over the break. Sophie was at the School for Evil with you, even though she had thought she had been placed in the wrong school. Agatha, like Sophie, believed that she should have been dropped at the opposing school and she resided in the School for Good. The three of you would find time to talk during meals, of course avoiding the guards as much as possible, and during the middle of the night, when Lesso was asleep.

Throughout the weeks you and Lady Lesso had gotten significantly closer, you would spend time with her in between classes and take walks when neither of you could sleep. Of course there were the stolen glances between the two of you during meals and in the hallways of the school. And the relentless teasing by the redhead. She loved seeing you get flustered, especially when you were around others, trying to hide it.

You had finished your last class for the week and it was now the weekend. You were on your way to Lady Lesso's office to see her, because you didn't have her class today, you hadn't seen her at all. She had been getting quite busy over the last week with paperwork piling up. So much so that, you decided to sleep in your own room, feeling neglected by the older woman.

You felt as if she was pushing you away, as if you were nothing but a nuisance. Of course you didn't express that to her because you were afraid of what she would say. You knew that she could have quite the temper when she was irritated, and you didn't want to be on the receiving end of it. You weren't scared of Lady Lesso herself but something about being yelled at by her, frightened you.

You arrived at her office, knocking on the large wooden door, waiting for permission from the dean to enter. A small "come in" was spoken from the other side of the door, cueing you to enter. Walking into the room and closing the door behind you, you saw the redhead sitting at her desk, working on papers for her class. Not bothering to look up, you took a seat at one of the chairs in front of her desk, watching her. "Is there something I can do for you Y/N?" she asked for a bite to her tone. Taken aback by Lesso's tone of voice. You look down, picking at your fingers as you answer, "I- I just wanted to see you. I haven't seen you at all today." You say your voice is shaking a bit. "I appreciate the sentiment, but I am very busy right now." She said, still not raising her head from the papers she was grading. "Yeah, it seems like that's all you're doing lately." You bite back, now gaining the attention of the older woman. "Mind repeating that again pet?" She asked, raising an arched brow. "I said it feels like that's all you're doing lately." "I am the dean of this school, I have paperwork that needs to be completed." She responds. "And while you're doing that paperwork, do you stop to sleep, or even eat for that matter?" You ask, your voice raising. "My work comes first." She relies, plainly. "Clearly, sorry I disrupted your work. I'll go now." You say, tears pricking your eyes.

Standing to leave, you turn your head as to not let Lady Lesso see your face. Making your way to the door, looking back once, you see the dean now focused again on her work. You voice quivering, you manage to draw out, "have a nice weekend Lady Lesso" before leaving her room and returning to yours. Lesso could hear the sadness in your voice as you left her office, wanting to run after you and tell you that you were all that she could think about. But she knew that she needed to finish grading her students' papers.

— — —

You had spent the weekend in your room, not bothering to leave for meals or even to meet your friends. Orion was spending the weekend with Agatha at the School for Good, during which your two friends had become increasingly worried about you.

The urge to hurt yourself was slowly eating away at you, but you couldn't bring yourself to do it. Thinking about how Lesso would react, she had been so proud of you. You had been clean for three weeks, but clearly she didn't care so why should you. Moving to your bathroom, you sat on the ground, back to the bathtub before rolling up your sleeves. Moving the blade to your wrist you cut vertically, a bit harder than you meant too, the blood poured out at a rapid pace. The sight of the blood wasn't the only thing that made you lightheaded. The amount of blood you were losing caused your body to feel heavy, and your movements as if they were in slow-motion.

What you didn't know is that your friends had talked with Lady Lesso, expressing their concern, with your behavior over the weekend. The Dean had experienced a sinking feeling in the pit of her stomach, leading her to look for you. She had checked the garden, the library and her room, the search being fruitless. Her last thought was to check your room, knocking on your door, she waited for a response but received none. Knocking again and getting the response she entered your room finding it empty. Your nightstand drawer was open, your knife missing from its usual place. Lesso blood ran cold at the realization. Frantically looking around your room ,she noticed your bathroom light on. Moving to the bathroom she attempted to open the door, the lock preventing her from entering. Calling out your name, hoping for a response she waited. Without gaining a response, the lock on the door clocked, confusing her. She hadn't been the one to unlock the door, but pushed the thoughts aside opening the door.

Her heart stopped as her eyes widened at the scene before her. You lay, face pale, a thin sheen of sweat coating your body. Moving quickly to sit beside you, she grabbed a cloth, pressing it to your arm in an attempt to minimize the bleeding. The redhead couldn't help but feel as if this was her fault. All you wanted was some of her attention, but she had been so wrapped up in her work. Too blind to see what was blatantly obvious she let tears escape from her eyes.

"Lesso?" Heart jumping at the sound of your voice, her focus shifted to your face. "Darling, I need you to stay awake for me." "T-thank you... for everything. You gave me hope for a better life." You tell her, your response coming out breathy. "No... no, you're not leaving me. Please, I need you." The redhead said, tears streaming down her face. "You will do great things. I just know it." Tears slipping from your eyes. "I wanted to give you the world." Lesso said, her voice merely a whisper. "You did, you showed me that life is nothing to be afraid of. That my past doesn't define me. Please take care of Orion for me. And t-take care of yourself." Your voice softer than ever, your gaze shifted to another presence standing in the room. Lesso's gaze follows yours, you see Clarissa standing in the doorway, eyes wide. Lesso's eyes pleading with the Dean of Good for help she rushes to you, trying to calm down the ginger while assessing you. "Dovey, please take care of her for me." Clarissa nods her head, watching as your eyes flutter shut, as you take your last breath.

Lesso desperately tries to wake you, her attempts are futile, Agonized screams are ripped from the older woman's throat as she holds you close. "No please wake up darling. Please wake up." the redheads voice pleading with your now lifeless body. "This is all my fault." She says, her voice wavering. "No, you couldn't have known that this was going to happen." Dovey says in an attempt to calm her counterpart. "All she wanted was my attention, for me to show her affection. And I was too wrapped up in my work to see it."