guilty conscience | minsung

7

"goddamnit, just shut up." jisung muttered to himself after a while of rocking back and forth, talking to himself and getting tired of it, all while changbin slept peacefully on his side of the bed.

after getting restless from the deafening silence, he threw off the blanket off him and got up from his bed to grab a glass of water.

he looked around the dark room, being only lit by the small lamp in the middle of both of their beds as he went behind the kitchen counter to look for a glass.

when he realised it was in the cupboards, he started overthinking for a whole minute about what would happen if he opened the cupboard and shut it too loudly on accident and changbin woke up and possibly got mad at him because he woke him up by being a dumbass-

okay jisung! it's just a cupboard, calm down!

once almost shaking at the thought of being hated by changbin over closing a cupboard too loudly, he just decided on directly drinking from the jug kept on the counter. gulping down almost the entire jug that was filled to the brim.

and perhaps, he might have just realised he hadn't eaten or drank anything for almost two days. a sigh escaping his mouth as he kept the jug down too loudly for his overthinking mind.

he instantly looked up to see if changbin had woken up and he almost screamed when he saw the boy just standing in front of him on the other side of the counter.

"damn, you okay?" changbin asked once making out jisung's scared face in the dark, walking around the counter to be more near to jisung.

"yeah.. I'm fine." jisung mumbled, looking away from changbin.

"did I wake you up?" he asked soon after, meeting changbin's eyes only for a second since he felt scared the boy might shout at him for waking him up.

"oh, no... I was awake the entire time."

that sentence made jisung look up at changbin almost instantly from where he was looking at the ground.

"w-what?" jisung could feel his breathing getting narrower as he tried to remember whatever he was saying to himself all while thinking changbin was sleeping... no, this can't be happening.

surely... changbin wouldn't have heard anything, right?

who was he kidding, of course he had heard, he was speaking too loudly, for god's sake!

changbin could see the dread filling into jisung's eyes and he almsot felt bad for telling the truth, maybe it would've been better if he lied.

--

jisung didn't expect to absolutely be drenched in sweat and in tears when he woke up from his sleep. that was not what he thought would happen when he was having such a nice sleep. though it was already ruined.

he heaved out an almost relieved sigh upon realising that none of that had actually happened. he himself didn't know why he was so scared of someone finding out who he actually is, that he had a fucking nightmare about it.

jisung attempted to wipe away the sweat from his face, feeling icky as his body's sweat had already soaked into his clothes.

he found it sort of hilarious. did he really wake up scared because someone found out he wasn't as happy as he appears to be?

jisung looked around the room, seeing as it was 9pm and changbin wasn't here at the dorm yet.

but then he heard the bathroom door click, causing jisung to almost fall of the bed since he got caught off thinking that changbin wasn't at the dorm.