Say you Love me

(7)Lacuna

𝐋𝐚𝐜𝐮𝐧𝐚(𝐧):
𝐀 𝐛𝐥𝐚𝐧𝐤 𝐬𝐩𝐚𝐜𝐞 ; 𝐀 𝐦𝐢𝐬𝐬𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐩𝐚𝐫𝐭.

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A Lover dies,
but the love doesn't.
It was supposed to be for eternity, so how can her memories will be erased just like that?

______________________________________

(Flashback continuation)

And first thing I saw that her black dress was already on the floor while she stood in her hills and black lingerie.

She was looking in front, her back facing towards me. I stood their not even trying to move, and for few second she didn't move either. But then she slowly turn towards me.

I couldn't see her face properly, but i saw her walking towards me and she stoped minimum a foot away from me.

I looked at her, and she looked at me. I couldn't move, I was frozen in my place. And that's not because how she looked, it because a sudden rush of emotion run through out my body.

She hesitate a little bit too but she put her hand around my neck and close the distance, I could still smell the strong alcohol. Our lips inch apart, but i didnt lean this time.

I hold her shoulder and push her away gently while holding her shoulder, creating a enough distance between us. I need to breath, I feel suffocating suddenly.

All of a sudden my huge pent house felt closed box trapping me inside.

I took few breath in trying to relax my racing heart, and when I open my eyes I saw her, My Naomi smiling at me with a tear in her eyes..

The pain of her death still lingered in my heart like an open wound that refused to heal no matter how much I wanted it to.

That's when the realisation stuck me.

Their is this deep emotional connection I have with her that even her death couldn't break it. The connection I feel for her is the reason I never craved for any other women after her.

Today I tried to give in to the temptation, tried to find peace in life, give myself another chance, But see I couldn't even look at the woman standing in front me.

I don't need peace, because the memories is itself is peace for me.

When I sit beside her grave I feel peace, when I look at sky and think of her I feel peace.

Stupid!! Stupid!! How can I be so stupid..

I loved her, NO NO I love her, I am in love with her and I will be always in love with her. She is my Wife for saying out loud. I have a type feelings for her that i couldn't or wouldn't have for anyone ever.

But irony I couldn't even tell her that when I should have told her her. When she was with me, when she was by my side.

"Is everything alright?" I heard kate's confused voice.

"I-I " I took a deep breath "I am sorry Kate, I cannot do this" I said in one breath while shaking my head.